It’s Very Telling How I Am Not Telling

| England, UK | Bad Behavior, Employees

Caller: “I’m looking to speak to [Director], please.”

Me: “He isn’t available right now.”


Me: “Can I take a message or get him to call you?”

Caller: “That’s fine I just need to know who to speak to regarding recruitment advertising.”

Me: *rolling eyes – we get about five of these types of calls a day* “We don’t advertise for recruitment. We have suppliers.”

Caller: *agitated* “I just need to know who those suppliers are.”

Me: “We don’t have to provide that information.”

Caller: *very agitated* “I didn’t say you had to tell me!”

Me: “Goodbye.” *click*

Tiles And Cats And Ants, Oh My

| USA | Trending

(My boyfriend and I are moving out of our trailer, and the landlord comes with us to inspect it before we get our deposit back. From the start, we realize he is going to be difficult with us.)

Landlord: “Why is the bathroom door crooked? And part of a tile is missing from the floor!”

Me: “The bathroom door was put on by the maintenance guy; we haven’t tried moving it. And the tile was missing when we moved in. It should be marked somewhere.”

Landlord: “Well… there’s cat hair all over the carpet! You didn’t even pay a pet deposit!”

Boyfriend: “…because we don’t own a cat? I don’t see any hair on the carpet.”

Landlord: “There’s ants everywhere!”

(There is a well-known ant problem in the trailer park, which management refuses to fix.)

Boyfriend: “It’s the same for all of the other trailers here…”

Landlord: “Ugh, fine, it’s good enough. I’ll get your d*** deposit.”

(We got it back in full.)

A Hack Of An Excuse

| Portland, OR, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Technology

Me: “Hey, excuse me; I’m looking for a USB cable. You know, just with USB on both ends, the longest you’ve got.”

Employee: “Oh, we don’t sell those. Most retailers don’t, because they’re often used for hacking.”

Me: *looks at laptop display case* “Oooookay.”

The Rent Isn’t The Only Thing That Will Be High

| Vienna, Austria | Employees, Money

(I’m showing a high-end inner city commercial space with an outside area to potential renters, both solemn businessmen in their 50s or 60s.)

Me: “This is the garden. For a restaurant, this could become an herb garden or the perfect pool party bar place. Or for a museum or art gallery, an exciting garden of sculptures. And if you want to use the inside premises just as offices, you could grow your own hemp plantation here to be able to afford the rent.”

Man, You’re In Trouble!

| Washington, DC, USA | Trending

(The phone rings with an internal call. I don’t recognize the caller’s name. I often get wrong number calls because my number is similar to another department.)

Me: “[Department].”

Caller: “Oh, sorry, I think I have the wrong number.”

Me: “No problem, goodbye.”

(Phone rings again; same caller.)

Me: “Looks like you got me again. Who were you trying to reach?”

Caller: “[My Name].”

Me: “Oh, that’s me. How can I help you?”

Caller: “I really think I have the wrong number.”

Me: “No, you just said my name. You’ve got me. Are you one of our new employees? [My Supervisor] said that the new employees would be calling me to schedule [Training].”

Caller: “But you have a man’s name, and a man’s job!”

Me: “I’m just going to pretend you didn’t say the second half of that, and, yes, my name is unisex, but it’s the feminine spelling, if you look closely. Would you like to schedule your training?”

Caller: “I think I have to check with my supervisor. Goodbye.”

(I beat him to the punch and called his supervisor (who I am good friends with) before he could. They sent him to diversity training and “had a little talk with him” before letting him schedule his training with me. I am keenly aware that my office is close to 70% men, but for a NEW employee to say something like that to a SENIOR employee was WAY out of line.)