They Have Muffin To Worry About

| FL, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Tourists & Travel

(We’re English, on holiday as a family, two adults, two children, and in Florida for the first time. It’s our last day and we are having breakfast at our favourite restaurant before heading for the airport. It’s a buffet restaurant but we have found they have the best blueberry muffins. Just before we finish breakfast I mention to my husband that we should try to pay extra for some muffins to take with us for a snack in the airport, so we decide to ask our waitress, who is a lovely Scandinavian girl.)

Me: “Hey, [Waitress], do you think we would be allowed to buy four extra blueberry muffins to take with us. We know we’ll need a snack at the airport and these are the nicest we’ve ever had.”

Waitress: *in stilted English* “Errm, I not sure. I go see.”

(About 15 minutes go by and we figure that she has been told no, when she appears again with a man, who we find out is the manager.)

Manager: “Hi, I’m [Name], the duty manager. I understand you have a problem with our blueberry muffins.”

Husband: “Oh, no, no… They’re the best we’ve had while we’ve been here and [My Name] wanted to know if we could pay extra for four to take with us to the airport. [Waitress] must have misunderstood. After all it’s probably an unusual request.”

Manager: *laughing* “Oh, right, that’s no problem, sir. [Waitress] will bring you some right out, no extra charge. I have to tell you though, it’s just a packet muffin mix and we just add extra blueberries! Now, you have a safe journey home and we hope you make it back here soon.”

(Our smiling waitress returned a few minutes later with a bag of eight hot blueberry muffins AND a bag of muffin mix! Needless to say, we have been back several times since and we make a point of stopping at that restaurant where we always get great service. We’ve never seen the same waitress or the manager again, though.)

Taxing Faxing, Part 15

| Montreal, QC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I am in charge of supervising money transfer between Bank’s partners and clients. We received a request to kickback an erroneous wire our client received a few months ago, and the order took an unusual amount of time to process due to lack of information. Eventually, the colleague in charge of processing wires confirmed she executed the transaction.)

Colleague: “It’s all done, [My Name]! I sent the fax for the transactions.”

Me: “A fax? Isn’t this done usually by emails?”

Colleague: “Yes, but our protocol requests that we proceed to these transfer through faxes.”

Me: “I see… The order has already been delayed for a while. How long do you think this will take to be processed?”

Colleague: “Probably one or two days.”

(Three days pass and we still do not see any evidence of money transfer going out. Our client is eager to have this payable out of its book and ask if we could just cancel the fax transaction and issue a regular wire instead of the whole kickback procedure.)

Me: “[Colleague], please call [Counterparty] and cancel the wire you issued earlier this week. [Client] wants to make a regular wire quicker by email. I’ll be in a meeting for the next hour, but do confirm me when you have cancelled the transaction so we can proceed as quickly as possible.”

(Later, I received the following email from my colleague:)

Colleague: “All right! I sent the fax to cancel the wire!”

(I literally had to bang my head on the desk for the next minute.)

Related:
Taxing Faxing, Part 14
Taxing Faxing, Part 13
Taxing Faxing, Part 12

Talking Out Of Their Asthma

| USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Health & Body

(It is just after daylight savings and the clock in our work room has not been changed yet. My coworker decides to take matters into her own hands and stacks up boxes to be able to reach it. She then makes a face about how dusty it is.)

Coworker: “Oh my! I’m gonna have an asthma attack. I don’t have asthma but I’m gonna catch it from this!”

(This coming from someone who works in a pharmacy and knows how this stuff works!)

Burst Their Bubble Tea

| Ithaca, NY, USA | Bigotry, Employees, Food & Drink

(I attend a college with a high population of Asian students, which means that the surrounding commercial area has a lot of Asian shops and restaurants that are usually staffed by Asian workers. A new bubble tea place opens, so I decide to stop by on my way to my boyfriend’s apartment one day. Bubble tea can come with “bubbles,” which are very chewy and round, or “jellies,” which are firmer and rectangular. Note: I am white, and my boyfriend is half-Asian and speaks perfect Mandarin.)

Me: “Hi, can I get a mango green tea with bubbles, please?”

Cashier: “We can’t do that. All of our drinks come pre-made. The mango green tea comes with jellies.”

Me: “Oh, um… Can I add bubbles with the jellies, then?”

Cashier: “It’s $0.50 extra.”

Me: “Okay, whatever.”

(They make my drink and I take it back to my boyfriend’s place. I explain to him what happened, and tell him what I’d like to do next. We go back to the tea shop the next day. My boyfriend goes up to the counter and orders in Mandarin while I lurk out of sight. A couple minutes later, he brings me my drink.)

Boyfriend: “I asked for a mango green tea with bubbles and they just asked what size. And their drinks aren’t pre-made; they make them in the back from scratch!”

(Now every time I want a bubble tea, my boyfriend has to order it for me or the workers try to give me something I don’t want!)

Making A Bald Assumption

| Coworkers, Health & Body

(A customer has just called, and I answer the phone. She asks for my coworker, so I put her on hold and page him.)

Me: “[Coworker], you have a call on line one.”

Coworker: “Who is it?”

Me: “There’s a customer. She says she talked to you earlier about a computer.”

Coworker: “Did she ask for me by name?”

Me: “No, she asked for the old bald guy with the mustache. That would be you.”

Coworker: “I shouldn’t have asked.”