Spieling Over

| USA | Bosses & Owners, Crazy Requests

(The manager at the store I used to work for was ridiculously by the book. If the corporate office “suggested” each employee should have X number of customers per day, then he insisted that’s how many they should have, even if there weren’t enough customers during the entire day to get everyone the same number. He also required employees to give this long spiel whenever a customer walked in, even if it was a customer the employee knew. We’d occasionally even lose customers because of things like this. About six months after I left, I go into the store to pick up a friend of mine, who still works there, for lunch. As I walk in, a new employee I don’t recognize approaches me.)

Employee: “Hi, welcome to [Store]…” *he starts to launch into the speech*

Me: *smiles* “It’s okay; no need to give me the spiel. I used to work here.”

Employee: *chuckles nervously* “Oh… uh… no problem. It’s just…” *checks over his shoulder and sees [Manager] coming out of the back room* “I’ve only been able to do one of these today.”

Me: “[Manager] said you’d have to have a ‘one-on-one’ if you didn’t get anymore, right?”

Employee: “Yeah…”

Me: *sighing, I turn around, walk out the door and back in* “Okay, I’m a brand new customer! Give me the spiel!”

(He gladly gave me the store speech, which apparently had been added onto since I’d left. He finished right around the time my friend clocked out to have lunch with me.)


Scheduled To Quit

| USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Time

(I’ve been working at this fast food place for about six months when my best friend gets hired. We are teenagers and it’s our first job. I normally snap pictures of the schedule, but by her second week of the job the management asks the workers to stop doing that, due to regulations or some such thing. I had already taken a picture before anyone told me, and I send the picture to my best friend so she’ll know when she works. And as a backup, she also copies it into a notebook directly from the schedule itself a few days later. Neither of us is scheduled to work that Sunday, so we go out to a movie and post online about it. Come Monday evening, we walk into work together.)

Boss: *grumpy* “Hope you enjoyed that movie.”

Me: *slightly confused as to how she knows, because we weren’t friends online* “Yeah, it wasn’t too bad.”

Boss: *turns to my friend* “More fun than working?”

Friend: *jokingly* “Well, usually most things are.”

Boss: “Is that really the attitude you’re going to take on only your second week here?!”

Friend: “Huh…?”

(My boss then takes her to the back room and shows her the schedule that suddenly now says that she was supposed to have worked the day before. My friend swears that she didn’t know, otherwise she would have been at work, and promises to never ever let it happen again. Practically in tears for the rest of the night, she works quickly and quietly. I find the picture of the schedule on my phone and walk up to my boss.)

Me: “Ma’am, in all fairness, I don’t believe the schedule said that she was supposed to work yesterday. When I took a picture of it—”

Boss: “You know we aren’t supposed to take pictures of the schedule, [My Name]. Now get back to work.”

(I went back to work, but took a picture of every schedule from then on ever as proof. That manager didn’t last long, but my friend’s mother never trusted me ever again. To make it even worse, there was white out on the schedule for Sunday, where it had obviously been erased and rewritten. In the two and a half years I worked there, they changed the schedule within a day’s notice so many times that I eventually quit in frustration.)


Well, They Got One Thing Right

, | Gresham, OR, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring & Inattentive

(I pull up to the drive-thru to grab a soda and a snack after a stressful afternoon.)

Me: “Hi, can I get a large Diet [Soda] with lemon, no ice, please.”

Employee: “Do you want the lemon flavoring or a slice of lemon?”

Me: “Lemon flavoring, please.”

Employee: “Okay, so that was a large [Soda], with lemon, not Diet, right?”

Me: “Um, no. A large Diet [Soda], with lemon flavoring, no ice, please.”

Employee: “Okay. A large… Diet [Soda] with lemon, anything else?”

Me: “No ice in the drink, please, and a large french fry.”

Employee: “Okay. I’ll have that at the window.”

(I pull up and we have the cash exchange, and she hands me a bag of fries and my drink.)

Employee: “Oh, wait. I gave you [Soda], not Diet.”

(I try to return the drink to her.)

Employee: “Do you want to just, like, keep it?”

Me: “Umm, sure.” *even though I hate regular [Soda]*

Employee: *as she is passing the new drink out the window* “Here’s your large DIET [Soda] with lemon.”

Me: *noticing it has ice in it* “Um, it has ice. It was supposed to be no ice.”

Employee: *smiling proudly* “Yeah, but it’s DIET.”

Me: “But it was supposed to be no ice.”

Employee: *blank stare*


My Bank Takes 5010 Days

| Annapolis, MD, USA | Money, Time

(I am chatting online with a representative of a company about a faulty order we just received. They have agreed to send a replacement order and credit back a portion of the original purchase price.)

Representative: “Please allow me five minutes to replace the order.”

Me: “Thank you so much. I really appreciate all your help.”

Representative: “No problem. I have issued a refund of $100 to your credit card on file. This may take 305 business days to reflect on your account.”

Me: “305?”

Representative: “Yes. Please remain in the chat until I have completed the order.”

Me: “305 days?”

Representative: “Yes. Is the shipping address still the same?”

Me: “Yes. So it may take up to a year for us to see the money?!”

Representative: “Oh my gosh I am so sorry! 3-5 days.”

Me: “Haha, oh okay.”

Representative: “I am so sorry.”

Me: “Don’t be; that kind of made my day!”


Time To Checkout Who Was On Checkout

| USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners

(Just recently we got a new register that the owners have me programming. My manager has no idea how to work it. On this particular day a woman calls in.)

Customer: “Hi, I was in your store yesterday morning and I was charged for an item I didn’t buy.”

Me: “Not a problem, ma’am. I just need your name and the last four digits of the card you made the purchase with, as well as the name of the item we charged.”

(The woman provides all the information, and I find her in the system for yesterday morning.)

Me: “All right, I’ve refunded the amount. It should be back on your card by tomorrow morning. Have a great day!”

Manager: “Did you just refund her over the phone? How could you do that?! You have no idea if she was lying or not. I could get in serious trouble for this! They never should have let you work this register.”

(She continues to rant for a while as I check out other customers. Finally, she calms down and I’m able to get a word in.)

Me: “The item she claims she didn’t buy is a product we haven’t sold in months. She was in yesterday. There’s no way she could have bought it.”

Manager: “Well, that’s ridiculous! Who could have rung her up for something like that?”

(Going by who was on the schedule, it was my manager.)