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Irony Transcends All Races

| Manchester, England, UK | Bigotry, Coworkers

(My coworker is of Muslim faith, and of Indian origin.)

Me: “This client has the most French name ever. It’s [Very French Name].”

Coworker: “He wouldn’t like to speak with me.”

Me: “Why?”

Coworker: “French people are racist.”

Me: *waits for her to realise*

Coworker: “What? They are!”

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Trying To Give You Credit For It

| Manchester, England, UK | Employees, Money, Technology

(I have very little interest in mobile phones. The one I have is four years old, cost £2, and has no camera or access to the Internet. I use it mostly for telling the time and an alarm, though I do use it for texting and calls, just not very often.)

Call Centre: “Hello, Miss [My Name]. We’d like to offer you a deal on your phone, £10 a month and you get 500 free texts.”

Me: “I don’t use it that much; I spend a maximum of £5 on credit every three months.”

Call Centre: “But with this deal you can spend ONLY £10 a month—“

Me: “I spend £5 EVERY 3 MONTHS, your deal is twice that amount EVERY MONTH. Do you see why this is a deal that doesn’t interest me?”

Call Centre: “But think about all the free texts!”

Me: “I don’t need them; I’m not going to pay more money for something I don’t need.”

Call Centre: “I…”

Me: “Look, can you give me a deal that’s better than £5 every three months?”

Call Centre: “Um, no, I can’t do that.”

Me: “Then I think we’re done here.”

Call Centre: “But—“

Me: *click*

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Credit Us With Some Common Sense, Part 2

| Tampa, FL, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid

(I work in the quality department of a call center for a large bank that has branches across the country. This is a one of the calls I listened to:)

Member: “I would like to do a cash advance from my credit card and deposit to my checking.”

Representative: “Okay, is your cash advance on your account?”

Member: “…”

Representative: “Is your cash advance with the bank?”

Member: “Transfer me to the branch; I can’t handle the call center right now.”

Related:

Credit Us With Some Common Sense