Depositing Some Intelligence

| San Antonio, TX, USA | Employees, Technology

(When I first got this job at the call center, I found out I’d be working for a bank. As employees, we get a few special benefits, like discounts on accounts opened with the bank, BUT, we are not allowed to even so much as look at our information (legal issues). To see what and when my direct deposit will be in my new account, I have to call customer service.)

Rep: “Thank you for calling [Bank]. This is [Rep]. How can I assist you today?”

Me: “Yeah, this is [Full Name], and I need to see when my direct deposit will go into my account, and how much it is going to be.”

(They take my account number and security details, before there is a long awkward pause.)

Rep: “Ma’am, I can’t seem to find where your direct deposit would be listed? I don’t think you can see it until it’s posted to your account.”

(I sit there, dumbfounded. I had learned how to do this simple look up during my first week of training.)

Me: “Sir, how long have you been working here?”

Rep: “Six months, ma’am.”

Me: “Okay, wow… Do you know what [Database] is?”

Rep: “Oh, yeah, of course! How do you know what that is?”

Me: “I work for the San Antonio center. Okay, I’m gonna walk you through this.” *I take them through the instructions* “Then tell me the amount on it, and the deposit date. Okay?”

Rep: “Okay, done. You will get [amount] on [Date] deposited into [account].”

Me: “Excellent, thank you.”

Rep: “Thank you, miss, and I do have one more question for you.”

Me: “Yeah?”

Rep: “If you knew how to do it, why didn’t you just look it up yourself?”

Me: “Oh, my f****** god. Bye!” *click*

Should Be Clean Of Windows

| Scotland, UK | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Technology

(I work for a call center that gives technical support to people who have difficulty printing. This is one of the comments I hear from my coworker when he is trying to establish the compatibility with a device and the printer.)

Coworker: “So, what Windows edition do you have on your iPad?”

Not A Fan Of Your Service

| IL, USA | Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful, Technology

(I help my parents purchase a new desktop computer. It works fine, but the fan is clearly faulty; it screeches loudly when starting up and then runs very loudly. I get on the phone with tech support as my parents don’t know very much about the topic. The first two times I call, they refuse to replace the fan, claiming that it needs to be running all the time so it gets disabled by them when they remote access into the computer. I am now calling for the third time.)

Tech: “Hello, sir, what seems to be the problem?”

Me: “Hello, this is the third time I am calling about the same issue.”

Tech: “Okay, sir, let me look you up.” *he does so and once again remote accesses into the computer* “All right, let me install this program and I think you should be good to go.”

(I watch as he installs the same program that was done on the LAST time I called. Sure enough, as he finishes loading it, it pops up an error message stating that it had already been previously installed.)

Tech: “Okay, sir, that should solve your problem.”

Me: “Hang on a minute! I just watched what you did and it clearly said it changed nothing! How could you possibly say that the problem is solved?!” *I also notice that my mom has wandered into the room and has witnessed my exchange, and is now literally cheering me on*

Tech: *literally does not speak for the next five minutes as he moves the mouse and opens random folders* “So… you were watching what I was doing?”

Me: “Yes, I was!”

Tech: *another gap in conversation* “All right, sir, it appears that your fan is damaged and we will be sending out an individual to repair it.”

Me: “Thank you!”

Tech: “Would you like to speak to my supervisor?”

Me: “Yes, I would!”

Tech: “Okay, please hold…”

Supervisor: “Hello, sir, I wanted to speak to you about your experience just now.”

Me: “Fine by me.”

Supervisor: “Well, first of all, you seem to have been on the phone with him for a very long time. Was there some kind of problem?”

Me: “Well, you know, I really hate to get people in trouble, but there was. This guy tried to claim that he had fixed the problem but I watched him do nothing. I also don’t want to claim that I know more than any of you guys, but I work in technology and I know for a fact that he wasn’t telling the truth.”

Supervisor: “Well, I am very sorry about that, sir. There is no excuse for that and I will make sure that he does not speak to you again.”

Me: “Thank you.”

Supervisor: “I hope everything will be resolved to your satisfaction. We have one of our men scheduled to come out to your place on ********.”

Me: “Thank you again, and have a nice day.”

Supervisor: “You too, sir. Thank you.”

(Two days later the same original tech calls us back. The real kicker? When the repair technician came out, he opened up the desktop, spun the fan once manually, and immediately said:)

Repair Tech: “Well, there’s your problem right there…”

Please Hold For The Employee To Get Fired

| Finland | Bad Behavior, Coworkers, Lazy/Unhelpful

(We have a very lazy and uncaring worker at our call center. He often clocks in late and clocks out early.)

Coworker: *answers a call* “Thank you. Your call is important to us. Please hold.” *turns on CD player so loud the caller can hear the music*

Me: *gesturing* “What the h*** are you doing?!”

Coworker: “I’m taking a coffee break now.”

(A minute elapses…)

Coworker: *turns the radio off* “All the representatives are busy at the moment. Please call later.” *hangs up*

(He didn’t stay long.)