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The Service Is Slawless

, | Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring & Inattentive

(I receive the custom burger I’ve ordered. I take a bite, but something seems to be missing, so I check under the bun, and then return it to the counter.)

Me: *pointing to the list of ingredients I’ve requested that are taped to the board the burger is served on* “Excuse me; there’s no coleslaw.”

Server: “Sorry about that. I’ll get it fixed now.”

(She gives the burger to a cook with an exasperated hand gesture and says something like “forgot the slaw” and then walks away. I watch the cook take the burger off the board, take the top bun off the burger, look at the burger, look at the list of ingredients for a few seconds, put a fresh piece of paper on the board, put the bun back on the burger and the burger back on the board, put a fresh wooden skewer through the burger and hand back the unchanged burger to the server.)

Server: *cheerily* “Here it is!”

Me: “Um… there’s still no coleslaw.”

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The Dirty Dozen

, | Brisbane, QLD, Australia | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I don’t usually like take away but this particular day I felt an unusual craving for chicken nuggets.)

Me: “Hi, I’m just wondering what quantities the nuggets come in?”

Cashier: “Umm, 3,6,9,12, or 18?”

Me: “Oh, can I please have half a dozen nuggets please?”

Cashier: “Oh, we don’t do half a dozen only 3,6,12, and 18 packs.”

Me: “Okay, I’ll have six, please.”

Cashier: “Sure, that’ll be [price]. Sorry, we’re not allowed to change the pack sizes.”

Me: “Um, that’s okay…”

(I walked away with my “six nuggets” with three free ones.)

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Not… Done… Not Listening!

, | Jackson, CA, USA | Employees, Ignoring & Inattentive

(I decide to go through the drive-thru of one of the local fast food restaurants. I used to work at this location, so I place my order as easily as possible, so the employee doesn’t have to ask 100 questions.)

Me: “Hi, I’d like a medium #4, with three egg rolls instead of the fries, and a Dr. Pepper with light ice, please.”

Employee: “Okay, that’s a #4 with onion rings and a small Diet Coke?”

(As she says this, the items start appearing on the order screen.)

Me: “Um, no. I’d like it with three egg rolls and a medium Dr. Pepper.”

(I see the onion rings disappear from the ordering screen, but the Diet Coke stays up there.)

Employee: “Okay, if your order looks correct, it’ll be—”

Me: “My order isn’t correct. I’d like a medium Dr. Pepper with light ice, not a small Diet Coke.”

(She finally rings up the correct drink.)

Employee: “Does your order look correct now?”

Me: “Yes, but I’m not done ordering. Can I get—”

Employee: “Your total will be—”

Me: *losing patience* “I’M. NOT. DONE. ORDERING. YET.”

(Silence from her while I gather my composure.)

Me: “Can I get two tacos with no taco sauce, please?”

Employee: *sigh* “Will that complete your order?”

Me: “Yes.”

Employee: “Your total will be [total] at the window.”

(The funniest part was that the person working the drive-thru was the manager! I was polite my entire time at the window, but she all but threw my change and food at me before mumbling a thank you and slamming the window shut. My fiancée, who was in the car with me, couldn’t stop laughing the entire time.)