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Got To Give Them Credit For Trying Again And Again And Again

| Winnipeg, MB, Canada | Employees, Ignoring & Inattentive

(While perusing cheese, I am approached by a woman selling store credit cards. My husband has accused me of being too nice in these situations…)

Woman: “Hello! Can I interest you in a [Store] credit card?”

Me: “No, thank you.”

Woman: “But you are shopping here; you could receive so many extra store points with a store credit card!”

Me: “I guess, but I am really not interested in another credit card.”

Woman: “We can talk about it while you shop! I can even get you started on an application! It’s very easy!”

Me: “No, really. I’m not interested, thanks.”

Woman: “All I need is your name and address, and we can get that going for you.”

Me: “I’m really not comfortable with this. I’m not interested.”

Woman: “But you shop here! You should get a card!”

Me: *thinking how I could shake this woman* “Well, I’m actually here to get a prescription, so I don’t have any time to look at this. Maybe I could look at a pamphlet—”

Woman: “Oh, no, we don’t have pamphlets. But if you give me your name and mailing address I can get you signed up and you’ll receive additional information in the mail!”

Me: “No, I don’t want that. And I have to go now. My prescription—”

Woman: “Are you picking it up here in the store? I can walk with you and we can get this application going!”

Me: “NO. No. Thank you, but no. I’m not—”

Woman: “You really should get the credit card; you can use it in the pharmacy as well!”

Me: “NO, THANK YOU. I HAVE TO GO NOW!”

(I used my very long legs to zoom away from her. It wasn’t until after I had picked up my prescription that I realized I had walked away with goat cheese… I was too afraid of encountering the saleswoman again, so I bought the cheese and went home!)

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Employing New Tactics

| Edmonton, AB, Canada | Employees, Language & Words

(I work as a courtesy clerk, and despite wearing the uniform, I am constantly asked if I worked there. I start getting creative.)

Customer: “Do you work here?”

Me: “Nope, but I’m employed here.”

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I Prefer Beer From Ginger Myself

| Chattanooga, TN, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly, Food & Drink

(I am checking out at the grocery store. The cashier scans most of my items, but leaves a few sitting out, and makes a call on the intercom:)

Cashier: “Seven on three. Seven on three.”

(I wait for a while as she stands, tapping her feet. I wonder why she doesn’t complete my transaction. Then I take a harder look at the groceries she didn’t ring up.)

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. Ginger beer is non-alcoholic.”

(She turns beet red and scans the soda..)

Me: “When my brother-in-law was a kid, he got into an argument with the 7-11 cashier. She kept saying, ‘Beer from root! Beer from root!'”

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A Brainy Comment

| AB, Canada | Bosses & Owners, Math & Science, School

(While pursuing my master’s, I’m working at a grocery store to make ends meet. One day I’m struggling to get a pallet jack working. The visiting regional manager is watching me, and growing frustrated. Finally, he decides to chew me out.)

Regional Manager: “Come on, you dumb s***. It’s just a tool. It’s not rocket science!”

Me: “I’m studying for my master’s in physics! ROCKET SCIENCE, I CAN DO!”

(Since I am having a rough day to begin with, my response is a little louder than he expects, and he is quite taken aback. But I must have had an effect because the next time he’s chewing someone out, this happens.)

Regional Manager: “Come on, this isn’t rock…” *trails off as he sees me* “THIS ISN’T BRAIN SURGERY!”

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Registering Your Faith

| Chambersburg, PA, USA | Coworkers, Religion

(On a particularly slow evening at the registers, I get to witness the following between two fairly close coworkers.)

Coworker #1: *jokingly* “I swear I’m going to punch you!”

Coworker #2: “Do it! I dare you!”

(Coworker #2 then moves towards Coworker #1, at which point he picks up the order dividers for his lane and holds them in a cross shape.)

Coworker #2: “The power of Christ compels you! The power of Christ compels you!”

Coworker #1: “HA, I’M JEWISH!”

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