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Don’t Get Testy(sterone) With Me

| Employees, Health & Body, Ignoring & Inattentive

(I’m a 17-year-old female. I haven’t started university yet but I study medicine, specifically infectious disease, on my own time because I find it interesting and I hope to go into the field when I go to university. I help my neighbor with her animals. One day one of her cats is attacked by a different neighbor’s dog and injured. Unfortunately the cat bit me very deeply several times on my finger when I was holding her to help examine her and my father takes me to the ER. This exchange happens when the nurse comes in to give me precautionary rabies vaccine and immunoglobins.)

Nurse #1: “All right, let’s get this over with. I’m going to be giving you a shot now. It’s to make sure—“

Me: “That I haven’t been exposed to rabies, and if I have been it will prevent it from infecting me.”

Nurse #1: “Right. I see they already explained it to you.”

(I see her start to draw up the vaccine. I’m a little concerned when she has trouble right off the bat, struggling to pull it up into the fairly small needle.)

Me: “Um, the vaccine shouldn’t be that thick, right?”

Nurse #1: “Sometimes it is a little harder.”

(She turns the vial a little to get a different grip and I am horrified to see that it is not, in fact, the correct vaccine. She is trying to pull up testosterone.)

Me: “Ma’am, I don’t think that’s the right vaccine.”

Nurse #1: *ignores* “Ah, there we go. Now please roll up your sleeve. We can do this on your shoulder.”

Me: *moves away from her slightly* “Ma’am, I saw the vial. You should be giving me ImoVax or RabAvert. That vial is marked testosterone.”

Nurse #1: *gets red faced mad* “Now listen here, missy, I know what I’m doing. Now come here!” *literally lunges at me with the needle*

Me: “DAD, I NEED SOME HELP!”

(It took my father and two other nurses to get Nurse #1 to put down the syringe and actually look at the vial. Thankfully I got a different nurse to give me the right vaccine and immunoglobins.)

Nurse #2: “I’m sorry about that. She’s being let go in about two weeks and she’s been acting… erratic. She won’t be in the ER after this.”

Me: “Thanks. Do you think I could… see the bottles this time?”

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Fill In The Blanks

| England, UK | Employees, Health & Body, Ignoring & Inattentive

(My friend isn’t feeling well, so my boyfriend and I pay for a taxi and take them to A&E. When we get there my friend runs to the bathroom and I go to the counter to check them in. There are two people, a man in a suit typing away and a woman in a nursing uniform who looks less busy than the man. I decide to try going to the less busy person first.)

Me: *stands in front of the nurse, who stares blankly at her screen for a few minutes*

Me: “Excuse me?”

Nurse: *blankly stares at me*

Me: “I need to check my friend in?”

Nurse: *blank stare*

Me: “They’re unwell?”

Nurse: *blank stare*

Me: “They need to see a doctor?”

Nurse: “Oh. Right. This man will help you.” *motions to male typing on his computer*

Man: *blank stare*

(I’m really glad that wasn’t the place where people go for emergency treatment or anything.)

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Pregnant With Ignorance

| Birmingham, England, UK | Employees, Health & Body, Ignoring & Inattentive

(I have gone to the hospital with a rather intimate problem and of course the doctor asks me about my private life, etc. She then asks if I minded talking to a new student nurse and I agree, as they have to learn!)

Nurse: *after reading my notes CLEARLY stating I have never had relations with anybody* “I think you might be pregnant.”

Me: “Well, that is impossible, unless it is another virgin birth.”

Nurse: “Well, I’m certain you are pregnant and I want you to do a pregnancy test to clarify.”

(I do but I roll my eyes and no surprises when it came up negative. The nurse looks at it.)

Nurse: “I still think you’re pregnant…”

(I felt like screaming, but both I and the doctor had a laugh when I told her!)

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That Moment We All Thread

| Germany | Employees, Health & Body, Ignoring & Inattentive

(I had a laparoscopy to remove fluid of a burst abscess from my stomach. I only have three small wounds, closed with one thread each. Unfortunately, the tube for the drainage was placed right next to a nerve, causing extreme pain, so they had the head physician remove the threads and the drainage.)

Doctor: “There, all done.”

Me: “Miss, you only removed the drainage and the thread that held it in place…”

Doctor: “Yes, as I’ve said, all done!” *smiles*

Me: “I’m pretty sure the wounds in my navel and on the left side of my stomach were stitched, too.”

Doctor: “No, no, don’t worry. There was only one thread.”

Me: “Miss. There is blue fuzz in the scabs of both wounds. I’m pretty sure that my blood isn’t able to form blue fuzz. Those are the knots of threads, as far as I can tell.”

Doctor: *checks my wounds* “No, all done. There are no threads.”

(About a week later, my wounds got infected, so I got my mother’s medical kit out (she’s a nurse) and carefully removed the scabs to disinfect the new scar tissue. Lo and behold, there were the blue threads. I removed them myself and the infection healed, but the two scars where the threads were left in still act up to this day and are, despite their small size, very eye catching and ugly. The doctor got laid off after nearly the whole hospital staff signed a petition against her.)

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Has No Hang Ups About Hanging Up

| Hungary | Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful

(It’s Thursday and I’m calling to ask whether my doctor, whom I visit three times a year, is in the next day. I never needed to get an appointment before; I just show up. According to the schedule posted online she is on duty on Friday, but since it is summer, she might be on holiday. The schedule also seems to be old, so I want to make sure.)

Assistant: “[Hospital Department], [Assistant] here.”

Me: “Good morning, I’m [My Name] and I’m calling to ask if [Doctor] is in tomorrow.”

Assistant: *in an unfriendly, resentful tone* “Morning. No, she won’t be here. Goodbye.”

(She quickly hangs up before I can say another word. I really hate to speak on the phone anyway so my boyfriend calls the hospital back to ask again.)

Boyfriend: “Good morning, I would like to ask when [Doctor] will be in next week.”

Assistant: “Morning. On Tuesday. ” *hangs up again immediately*

(Someone really did not want to do their job that day! But maybe if we make a third call, we will finally know the exact hours…)

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