Very Slow Death Of A Salesman

| NY, USA | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive

(I have just finished a long and painful conversation trying to get a quote from an insurance salesman. The entire time he was very slow, messed up a lot of his script and had to repeat from the beginning, and spent at least 30 seconds after each question saying “uhmm… okay… one second…” I am incredibly frustrated and receive a very high price quote by the end. I try to be polite as possible.)

Salesman: “So let’s begin the process of making you a part of our family here.”

Me: “Thank you for your help, but I am going to call a few other places and think about my options. I will call you back when I make my decision.”

Salesman: “No problem. Do you have any other questions before you go?”

Me: “No, thank you. You’ve been very helpful.”

Salesman: “Okay, have a great day. Goodbye.”

(We hang up. 15 seconds later the phone rings and my mother picks up.)

Mom: “Hello… Yes, this is her mother… No, but thank you. I think she is good for now… Thank you. You, too.” *hangs up phone and looks at me* “That was the salesman. He said he accidentally disconnected and wanted to know if you had any more questions.”

THIS STORY HAS YET TO BE TITLED:

| UT, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Employees, Money

(I am twenty-three at this time, and have finished my bachelor’s degree. I am calling different car insurance companies for quotes before making a decision. I make it clear at the beginning of each call that I am only looking for quotes and am not going to be making any decisions today.)

Insurance Agent: “And let me add that student discount.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry; I thought I’d told you, but I must not have. I have finished my bachelor’s degree and I am not in school at the time.”

Insurance Agent: “That’s okay. You’re twenty-three; no one will question it.”

Me: “Please, that’s dishonest. I do not want the student discount.”

Insurance Agent: “No one will question it.”

Me: “I’m not worried about getting caught; I’m worried about being dishonest. Please, do not put the student discount in my quote.”

Insurance Agent: “Sweetie. I’m not tricking you. It’s not going to go up later.”

(By the way, calling me “sweetie” turns me off from you immediately. I’m twenty-three, but I’m still an adult, and your customer. And “sweetie,” especially with that tone is demeaning. I decide that even if I go with this insurance company, I will not be doing what I usually do, which is remember the name of the agent who gave me the quote so that they get the commission on the sale.)

Me: “I don’t think you’re tricking me. I just don’t want to be dishonest. Take it off.”

Insurance Agent: “Fine.”

(We continue with the quote process and then at the end…)

Insurance Agent: “So, are you interested in that?”

Me: “Maybe, but as I said, I am not making any decisions today.”

Insurance Agent: “Sweetheart. If you don’t decide to buy this, then I don’t get paid.”

Me: “And frankly at this point, I don’t much care. Thank you, and have a nice day.”

 

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Driven By Assumptions

, | UK | Bad Behavior, Transportation

(I’m 25 and have been working for several years. I’ve only just learned to drive and passed the test. I decide to go with a lease car suggested by my dad’s friend, since it actually works out cheaper as a long-term investment. I’m calling the car company’s insurance line.)

Me: “Hi, I’m calling to activate my seven-days free insurance for my new car?”

Agent: “Okay, I just need your personal details and the details of your car.”

(I give her them, including my date of birth and the manufacture year of the car.)

Agent: “Ooh, that’s a new model! Somebody’s being spoilt!”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Agent: “You’re getting [Car] as your first car? There’s no way a teenager could afford that. Mummy and daddy must love you! Lucky for some!”

Me: “Actually, I’m paying for this out of my own pocket. If you’ll notice my age, I’ve held off on learning to drive and buying a car until I could afford to pay for it all – and run it – myself.”

Agent: “Oh. Well… how was I supposed to know?”

Me: “Maybe in the future, don’t make assumptions about people!”

Doing A Bad Job (Description)

| Surrey, England, UK | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, Job Seekers

(My husband applies for a job and makes it to the final two candidates, to be told the other applicant got the job but that it was a difficult decision, with a ‘cigarette paper’ between the two. Encouraged, he applies for a different job with the same company a few months later.)

Husband: *to Receptionist* “I’m here for my interview with [Interviewer].”

Receptionist: “I’ll let her know you’re here.”

(Several minutes later, well past the interview start time, the interviewer arrives.)

Interviewer: “I’m sorry Mr. [Husband] you’ve wasted your time applying. We told you last time you were unsuccessful.”

Husband: “That was for a different job. This job is—”

Interviewer: “It’s the same job. It’s just a different title.”

Husband: “I beg to differ. Here is the job description. It’s completely different to the job I applied for a few months ago and it has a different title. I’ve just driven for 45 minutes and you’re not ready for the interview which was scheduled by your HR department?”

Interviewer: “It’s the same job. You really should confirm details like this before you set out for an interview.”

Husband: “So, if your HR department advertises a different job with a different title and job description, I should assume it’s the one you said I NEARLY GOT several months ago and not apply? After my last interview, which was with you, yourself, you said you were happy to consider me for any other suitable positions.”

Interviewer: “Um. I’m sorry you’ve wasted your time.”

Husband: “I’m sorry, you’ve wasted my time, inviting me for an interview for a job which was advertised by your HR department but which apparently doesn’t exist!”

Death Of A Sales Pitch, Part 4

, | Aptos, CA, USA | Crazy Requests, Employees, Health & Body

(It is the fall of 2006 and I receive a telemarketing call.)

Agent: “I’m calling to inform you that you qualify for a $15,000.00 life insurance policy with…”

Me: “I’m a full time student being supported by my parents. Life insurance is worthless to me. I’m already worth more dead than I am alive.”

Agent: “But, sir! It’s free until June of 2007!”

Me: “Well, I plan to be alive in June of 2007, Mr. Optimist!”

Agent: “I know we all want to hope for the best, but…”

Me: *hangs up*

Related:
Death Of A Sales Pitch, Part 3
Death Of A Sales Pitch, Part 2
Death Of A Sales Pitch

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