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No Screen To Protect You From Dumb Employees

, | Eugene, OR, USA | Employees, Ignoring & Inattentive, Technology

(My mom and I are at the mall running some errands and she asks me if I’d like to stop at our cell phone provider’s kiosk to see if they can replace my screen protector which is cracked. For emphasis, my screen protector is cracked not my phone’s actual screen. I catch the attention of one of the kiosk’s employees.)

Me: “Hi, I need to replace my screen protector. I got it at your store when I bought my phone. Can I buy a new screen protector here?”

Employee: “Well, what brand was it?”

Me: “Oh. I don’t know.”

Employee: “Well, you need to contact that company about getting a replacement.”

Me: “Oh, no. I’m not looking for a replacement. I was just hoping I could buy a new screen protector here and have you guys put it on.”

Employee: “You need to contact the company and then fill out the form to get a replacement.”

Me: “But I just want to BUY a new screen protector.”

(At this point I gesture to the case in the kiosk that has glass screen protectors in it.)

Employee: “Yeah, you need to contact the company.”

(My mom is bristling at this point and about to go off, but I shake my head at her and thank the employee and then walk about 20 ft. to a glass screen protector kiosk. They replace my screen protector with no problem, a two-week warranty, and a discount on my next replacement.)

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Wait Until You Hear What He Has To Say!

| Finland | Crazy Requests, Employees

(I’m walking through a small-ish mall to get to my bus, as I’m going to work. A mall vendor tries to stop me.)

Vendor: *begins his spiel*

Me: “Sorry, I’ve got to catch the bus to work!”

Vendor: “Work can wait!”

(All I could think of was if he was willing to tell my boss, our team of 7, and the client that his pre-ordered move was going to be late because he wanted to sell me a new Internet plan… or if he was willing to pay me the financial damages of losing my job, which could very well have happened.)

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Candy Man Cosmetics

| USA | Bad Behavior, Employees

(My brother and I live far enough apart that we don’t see each other all the time, but close enough that we will occasionally get together on a whim. Since it’s Memorial Day and neither of us has plans, we decide, day of, to meet up at a mall near his apartment. On my way there, I realize that I left my phone at home, but I am too far to turn around. So, I’m wandering around the mall, trying to run into him, as we hadn’t picked a place inside the mall to meet. While I’m doing this, a clerk of a cosmetic store stopped me in my path.)

Clerk: “Do you want to come and try our new cream?”

Me: “No, thanks.”

Clerk: “You know you want to.”

Me: “I’m fine.”

Clerk: “Come on. Just try it.”

Me: “Thanks, but I’m actually looking for my brother right now.”

Clerk: “Oh, he’s inside!”

Me: “I doubt that.”

Clerk: “Come on, he’s in here!”

Me: “I don’t really see my brother doing that. But you’re doing a really good impression of the creepy candy guy in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.”

Clerk: “No, he was lost and scared, looking for his sister, so we let him in here.”

Me: “He’s 22 and lives alone.”

(The clerk finally stopped after that.)

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They Don’t Know (Pepper)Jack

| FL, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(After walking back and forth along the mall length thrice, Mom and I decide to grab dinner at the food court. We go to a restaurant known for its chicken. She gets a chicken salad sandwich and I get the restaurant’s deluxe sandwich with colby jack cheese. I take a bite and immediately notice something’s wrong when I taste something spicy.)

Me: *opening the sandwich* “What the heck? I said colby jack not pepper jack!” *to Mom* “Be right back. Let me swap this real quick.”

(I go up to the counter with the sandwich and the receipt that says next to my order “CJ,” meaning colby jack, proving that’s what I initially ordered. I end up with a different cashier than the one who took my order, as she was free first.)

Cashier: “Can I help you?”

Me: “Yes.” *shows her the sandwich and receipt* “I ordered this with colby jack cheese but got pepper jack instead. Could I please exchange this for a new one?”

Cashier: “Oh, absolutely! I’m sorry for the mix up! That was the [Restaurant] deluxe, right?”

Me: “Correct.”

(I try to hand her the incorrect sandwich, but she refuses to take it.)

Cashier: “Oh, no! Go ahead and keep it! It was our mistake.”

Me: “Okay, then. Thank you.”

(Since they’d probably just throw them away anyway, I see no harm in keeping it. My second sandwich comes out, and I decide to check it on the spot just to be safe. Surprisingly, it also has pepper jack cheese.)

Me: “Um, are you guys out of colby jack by some sheer chance? This is also pepper jack.”

Cashier: “Um, I think that’s colby jack.”

(At this point I’m confused and wonder if I was initially mistaken, but I notice a sandwich on the menu board advertised as having pepper jack and the cheese on it looks exactly like the one on both my sandwiches. I point this out to the cashier.)

Cashier: “Um, let me just double check.”

(She takes the second one and goes to the kitchen window. I can’t hear the exchange, but she returns looking a bit flustered.)

Cashier: “I’m so sorry! We’ll have the right one out for you as quickly as possible! I’m sorry for the wait!”

Me: “It’s okay. I’m not starving. I can wait. Just tell them to give me American if they’re out of colby jack.”

(She moves over to another register to continue helping customers while I wait at the counter she was at. She turns to apologize every so often. Being an avid reader of Not Always Right, I jump to a conclusion.)

Me: “How long have you worked here?”

Cashier: “A couple months.”

Me: “Ah, I figured if you’ve worked here long enough you’ve met some customers that’d flip at this situation. Don’t worry, I make it a point to not be one of those customers.”

(She chuckles a little at this, and did seem to be more at ease. My sandwich arrives, and this time it has the right cheese. I thank the cashier and attempt to hand her the second pepper jack sandwich, but she lets me keep it, too. Once I return to the table…)

Mom: “There you are! I was wondering where you were. You were gone for so long I thought someone had stolen you!”

Me: “Nah, it just took them three tries to get the right kind of cheese on it. At least they let me keep the other two. Admittedly, I was tempted to demand a free milkshake or something after the second slip-up…”

Mom: “But you’re not that mean?”

Me: “Nope. Well, I try not to be, anyway.”

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Why Won’t Jew Buy It?

| Springfield, MO, USA | Employees, Ignoring & Inattentive, Religion

(I’m walking through the mall on a weekday. There aren’t many people walking around, so the vendors that stand in the walkways seem extra persistent to make sales. I accidently make eye contact with one of the vendors and he pulls me in. He explains that he’s selling a type of nail file and lotion made from salt from the Dead Sea. The product happens to be really expensive; more than an unemployed college student like me can afford, but he won’t listen to why I won’t buy the file.)

Vendor: “Okay, just for you I’ll make a special college price. How about $75.00?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I really can’t afford it.”

Vendor: “You just don’t understand how much of a good deal this is! My file will make your nails sparkle and the lotion will make your hands feel like silk! $75.00 is a bargain!”

Me: “I believe you, but as I’ve already mentioned several times I can’t afford it. It’s just too expensive.”

Vendor: “But it’s a steal at that price! You’re just skeptical. You can trust me, though. I’m a nice Jewish boy so I know all about the Dead Sea.”

Me: “That’s great, and I believe you, but that doesn’t change the fact that I can’t afford it.”

Vendor: “But you can trust me! I’m a nice Jewish boy! I grew up by the Dead Sea and can assure you this product works like a miracle!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m not buying it.”

Vendor: “But I’m a nice Jewish boy!”

Me: “You may be a nice Jewish boy, but if you don’t let me go I’ll turn into a not-so-nice Christian girl. If you don’t want me to pull my Bible out and try to convert you, I’d suggest you let me go.”

Vendor: “But… I’m a nice Jewish boy.”

(He still didn’t listen and continued to try to get me to buy the file and lotion. I did have a Bible with me and as soon as I pulled it out he got the hint and let me leave.)

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