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‘Force’ Your Way To The Front Of The Line

| Philadelphia, PA, USA | Employees, Geeks Rule

(I am standing in line waiting for the cashiers. While waiting, I’m watching the TV with one hand under my chin. An employee working around the store takes notice.)

Employee: “You look like you’re trying to lift something with your mind.”

(I thrust a hand out at a display and make a lifting gesture.)

Employee: *laughs* “Lift me out of this store.”

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This Call Was Destined To Be Fatality

| Edo. de México, Mexico | Employees, Geeks Rule

(I work in a video game store that also rents consoles per hour. When there are no customers, the owner allows us to play on the consoles. We have a phone, which is usually just to talk to our other locale, but for some days we’ve been getting calls from an airline that usually goes the same…)

Me: “[Business], what can I help you with?”

Sales Rep: “Good afternoon. I’m with [Airline] and I want to talk you about our special offers. Can I speak to the owner of the house?”

Me: “I told you, this is not a house. It’s a business.”

Sales Rep: “Would you still be interested in setting up a sales plan with us?”

Me: “I already said no. Please, stop calling.”

(One day I’m with another worker and he answers the call.)

Coworker: “It’s the airline guys again.”

Me: “You know what? Pass me the phone.”

(He does so. Currently I’m playing a fighting game that is infamous because of the gruesome finishing moves you can perform on the loser of the match. I proceed to increase the volume.)

Sales Rep: “Good afternoon, sir. Would you be interested in…”

(I immediately pointed the phone towards the TV just as the winning character proceeded to kill the opponent in a pretty violent fashion, complete with loud, pained screams. They stopped calling after that.)

Rated ‘G’ For Grandma

| Allentown, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Technology

(I find a video game that I’ve been looking for to replace a copy that I lost when I moved out of my dad’s house but don’t have the money with me to buy it, so my grandmother buys it for me with the stipulation that I pay her back when we get home. The game is rated M and it’s a requirement that the employees explain what this means when parents buy them for under-aged children.)

Employee: *to my grandmother* “All right, ma’am, just so you know this video game is rated “M” and I need to know if it’s okay for you to buy this for her.” *goes off on a scripted spiel explaining the blood, violence, and sexual content*

Me: “Um… I’m 24…”

(There is a long, awkward silence while both the employees stare at me, the only sound being my grandmother laughing. I pull out my ID and show them.)

Employee: “Okay, so, never mind. Enjoy your game.”

(The best part? Not only have I bought M-rated games at this store from these employees many times on my own before, but while I was waiting on my grandmother who was in another store at the time, I got into a discussion with them about video games and told them that one of my favorite games, which was released in 1994, was released when I was only three years old. Evidently it never clicked.)

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