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    Very Fond(le) Of Our Customers

    | WI, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers

    (My store’s dress code prohibits visible tattoos. I have a large tattoo on my back. One day, I come into the store on my day off. I am wearing a shirt with a cut out, making my tattoo visible. My coworker, who has many tattoos, comes up behind me and moves my hair out of the way to look at my tattoo. A customer walks up to the registers and gives her a weird look when she does that.)

    Coworker: *to customer* “She works here. I just never get to see her tattoo because we have to keep them covered.”

    Me: “No, she’s just fondling random customers.”

    A Not-So Delightful Driver

    | Cork, Ireland | Employees, Transportation

    (I overhear this conversation as people are getting on the bus.)

    Passenger: *asking the driver if it is the right route* “Hi, I’m going to [Place].”

    Driver: *without missing a beat* “I’m delighted for you, love.”

    (It took a lot for me not to laugh.)

    Don’t Want To Cause A Latte Trouble

    | MA, USA | Bad Behavior, Coworkers, Food & Drink

    (I am the customer in this situation. My husband orders us each a caramel iced latte. He comes back to the car from the store. He has got his order right and mine is wrong. It was a small, hot coffee that wasn’t marked ‘caramel.’ I thought maybe they had given him someone else’s order by mistake and he was too nice to fix it, so I go back in with the drink and the receipt, that says two iced caramel lattes.)

    Me: “Hi, I’m sorry, but I think my husband got the wrong order? I just wanted to make sure I didn’t get someone else’s coffee.”

    Employee #1: “Uh… [Employee #2], what do I do?”

    Employee #2: “Make her the right drink this time! Jesus, [Employee #1], that’s the third time today. At least this one is nicer than the last guy.”

    Me: “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to cause trouble. Really.”

    (My new drink is made in record time, and I’m not charged extra for it.)

    Employee #1: “It’s okay. I’ve been here a month and I should know what I’m doing, but I’m still new and I still mess up. I just don’t want to get fired. Thank you for the tip. Seriously. Have a nice day, and I’m sorry I messed up your drink.”

    (All the change I brought into the store with me in case I had to purchase my drink again was put in the tip jar that the employees share, and both the employees thanked me profusely. Seriously, coffee shop workers need to be cut some slack!)

    A Tired Basket Case

    | Australia | At The Checkout, Language & Words

    (It has been a long day, and I am not feeling great. I have been serving between a register and the separate cigarette kiosk. A customer walks up to my counter with a basket of shopping.)

    Me: “Hi. What can I get for you today?”

    Customer: “Umm… just what’s in my basket?”

    (The customer and I burst out laughing, realizing my mistake.)

    Warehouse Staff Brains All Stuffed With Fluff

    | Overland Park, KS, USA | Employees, Family & Kids, Religion

    (I work the guest services line at the call center for the [Cartoon Brand] catalog. We have begun selling ‘[Bear]Grams,’ which are ‘[Bear]‘ teddy bears dressed up in costumes for holidays and special occasions. The holiday ‘[Bear]Grams’ always sold out and we frequently worry that they won’t be delivered on time. The situation is the worst for Easter, but finally, a few days before Easter, the warehouse receives a large shipment of Easter ‘[Bear]Grams’ and is able to ship all of the orders out in time. A week or two after Easter, I receive a call from a woman who is obviously in emotional turmoil.)

    Customer: “I need help.”

    Me: “How may I help you? Is everything all right?”

    Customer: *continuing to cry* “Well, a few weeks ago, my family and I were scheduled to leave for vacation and my best friend got sick and went into the hospital. She assured me she would be fine and that we should not miss our vacation due to her minor illness. I called and ordered her a ‘Get Well [Bear]Gram’ and we headed out for our vacation. By the way, we’re Jewish.”

    (I think: ‘what does THAT have to do with anything?’)

    Customer: “While we were gone, my friend took a turn for the worse and died. My husband and I flew back for the funeral. Afterwards, I was talking to her sister and she said, ‘she really loved the ‘Easter [Bear]Gram’ you sent her.’”

    Me: *noticing that my manager was walking by* “Ma’am, I am so sorry. Can you hold on for one moment?” *I hit the hold button and turn frantically* “[Manager]! WE SENT A DYING JEWISH WOMAN AN ‘EASTER [Bear]GRAM’!”

    Manager: *shock and confusion writ large across her face* “What? Give her back all of her money. Do whatever she needs you to do!”

    (Obviously, in the Easter frenzy, the warehouse employees ‘decided’ that all of the ‘[Bear]Gram’ orders must be for Easter, and instead of sending the requested ‘Get Well [Bear]Gram,’ they did indeed send a dying Jewish woman an ‘Easter [Bear]Gram.’ Sometimes the customer is very, very right.)


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