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  • July's Theme Of The Month: Thrown Under The Bus!

    Thinking Outside The Boxes

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Coworkers, Geeks Rule

    (We are stocking a new store right in the centre of Sydney. As each truckload of stock comes in we have to unload it very quickly as a public laneway is blocked. We then have to stuff as much of it into a lift as possible.)

    Coworker: *slotting a box into a space* “To think my parents said all those hours I played Tetris were just a waste of time.”

    Non-Flights Of Fancy

    | Winnipeg, MB, Canada | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Geography

    (A coworker is a recent immigrant from The Philippines, who used to work in Saudi Arabia. She is relating her experiences to her coworkers, including our manager.)

    Manager: “So how far is Saudi Arabia from The Philippines, anyway?”

    Coworker: “I don’t know the actual distance, but it’s about 11 hours travel.”

    Manager: “…Driving?”

    (I was straining hard to keep from slamming my head into a table at that point…)

    Re-Dressing The Sauce

    | Cartersville, GA, USA | Employees, Food & Drink

    (I order my usual from [Popular Pizza Chain] and paid for it, everything looked fine but when I bite into my pasta, I notice that instead of Alfredo, everything tastes of ranch dressing. Needless to say, I call the store back, and this is the exchange.)

    Employee: “Thank you for calling [Store]. How can I help you?”

    Me: “Yes, I placed the order of two pastas online and we received both, but — and this may be me being crazy — but I swear this is ranch dressing instead of Alfredo sauce.”

    Employee: “Sir, I assure you that cannot be the case. I made them myself!”

    Me: “Are you really sure? Could you please do me a favor and check?”

    Employee: “Sure, one second.” *she puts the phone down, but apparently doesn’t mute it as I hear about 30 seconds later, over the phone* “THIS IS EFFING RANCH, YOU IDIOT! WHY IS IT IN THE ALFREDO BOTTLE?!”

    (The employee gets back on the phone with me, as I am dying of laughter.)

    Employee: “Sir! We will have a fresh order sent out to you right away! It appears there was a slight mistake and I grabbed the wrong bottle!”

    (They sent the remade order and even a free dessert! Thank you for being willing to check, and even taking ownership for the mistake!)

    Me Two

    | England, UK | New Hires

    (I am starting a part-time secondment at a museum, to work in their legal team. I have met one member of the team, a woman, before and know that there is also a man on the team. As I don’t have a pass, I have to wait for someone to get me so I can start. I am sitting in the main hall, in smart clothes, when a man comes up to me.)

    Man: “Hey, uh, are you [My Name]?”

    Me: “Oh, yeah, I am.”

    Man: “Great. And you’re starting work today, right?”

    Me: “Yes, that’s me.”

    Man: “Great. I’m Ed. It’s good to meet you.”

    (I’m a little confused as I’d thought the other lawyer in the team had a different name but decide I must be mistaken.)

    Me: “Good to meet you, too. I’m looking forward to starting.”

    Man: “Wonderful. Now, I’m so sorry we’re late, but I’ll take you up to Ancient Egyptology now.”

    (I know the legal team share a floor with an ancient history department so I assume he means he’ll take me up to that floor.)

    Me: “Oh, that’s no problem. I’ve not been here long.”

    Man: “Good. Um, I’m afraid Tam isn’t available until 11, but I’ll show you the ropes till then… maybe let you see some of the mummies.”

    Me: “Huh?”

    Man: “You look confused.”

    Me: “I don’t know a Tam.”

    Man: “You are [My Name], right? Starting today?”

    Me: “Ye-es but, uh, I’m not waiting for Tam.”

    Man: “Oh. Maybe I’m mixed up. I was told there’d be a young lady called [My Name] waiting for Tam who’s starting with us in Ancient Egyptology.”

    (Finally, the penny drops.)

    Me: “Oh, no, there’s been a mix-up. I’m waiting for [Lawyer] so that I can start a secondment with the legal team. Definitely not working in Egyptology!”

    Man: “Oh! Man, what are the chances of there being two [My Names] starting a job here on a Thursday? You even match the description Tam gave me of you! Oh dear, I hope the legal team rescue you soon then. In the meantime, I’m going to see if I can locate my [My Name].”

    (He wanders away. I get picked up by the lawyer about 15 minutes later. As she takes me to get my security pass, we happen to pass the man.)

    Man: “Oh good, you’ve been found. You’re doing better than me. I still can’t find my [My Name]…”

    (I heard later that the other ‘me’ was found eventually.)

    Poor Person Work Ethic


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