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  • May's Theme Of The Month: Movie Mayhem!

    Category: Bizarre/Silly

    A Meaty Topic Of Conversation

    | TX, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Bosses & Owners, Movies & TV

    Direct Supervisor: “Did you ever see the movie Alive?”

    Me: “Yeah…?”

    Direct Supervisor: “You know how they have to eat people to survive?”

    Me: “Uh-huh…”

    Direct Supervisor: “If that ever happened, and we’re in a plane crash together, I would not eat you. You don’t have much to bring to the table.”

    Cooking On Autopilot

    | ON, Canada | Bizarre/Silly, Bosses & Owners

    (I work for a call center for a hospital. I have to answer with the same greeting every time I hear a ‘beep’ in my headset letting me know a call is about to be connected. I am sitting in the break room, reading and not paying attention to my surroundings. My manager walks in and puts something in the microwave. The microwave dings.)

    Me: “[Major Hospital], [My Name] speaking. How may I help you?”

    Manager: *looks at me like I just sprouted a second head before bursting out laughing*

    Not Always Right But Funny

    | TN, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Bosses & Owners, Pets & Animals

    (I’m in the office, talking to the boss about a sick cat I’ve recently adopted.)

    Me: “…so my roommate and I have spent a lot of time at the vet lately. But it’s worth it to have someone to come home to.”

    Boss: “Yeah… I had a fish. He was a good companion. He’s been sick lately. I think he’s dead.”

    Me: *general understanding noise*

    Boss: “But at least I can have sushi tonight. Now he’ll satisfy me even more.”

    Me: “…”

    Boss: “That wasn’t right, was it?”

    A Fluffy Conversation

    | NY, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Rude & Risque

    (I am on the phone with a patron, checking titles for him. While I look them up on the computer, I can hear a voice in the background.)

    Patron: “Yes, I know what a fluffer is!”

    Me: “And so do I.”

    (Moment of silence, then the patron begins laughing.)

    Patron: “That made my day!”

    Barking In Code

    | Edinburgh, Scotland, UK | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers

    (I am working as a technician at one of the pop-up theatres at the Edinburgh Fringe when this happens. As with most places, we have the usual ‘Technician Sands’ code-words to use over the radios so we didn’t panic any customers.)

    Coworker: “Can… Erm… Can we please have… Technician Scooby to the main theatre space, please?”

    (This was a new one we’d never heard before, so about four of us showed up, only to be greeted by a very excitable small dog running around the stage.)

    Coworker: “I didn’t know what to say for ‘there’s a dog loose in the building!'”

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