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  • Good To Sell Until Hell Freezes Over
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  • Category: Extra Stupid

    Some People Are Unable To Change

    , | Sydney, NSW, Australia | At The Checkout, Employees, Extra Stupid, Math & Science, Money

    (I am going through the drive-thru of a burger place. The total comes to $7.20, I hand the cashier $10.20.)

    Cashier: “Here’s your change” *hands me $5 note*

    Me: “No, that’s not right” *hands back note* “I gave you $10.20 and the change is $3.”

    Cashier: *looking confused at the note* “Um, but you gave me…”

    Me: “$10.20, I get $3 change.”

    Cashier: *hands me three coins snootily* “There you are, then.”

    Me: “You gave me three $2 coins…”

    The New White-Bread America

    | Cincinnati, OH, USA | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I like to bake and I often make home-made bread. I like to make a loaf or two on the weekends and then I have bread for toast all week. I’ve done it for years. But at one office where I worked, I’d come in early and eat my toast in the employee lunch room and one coworker would force me into this conversation almost daily.)

    Coworker: “Where did you get that bread?”

    Me: “I made it.”

    Coworker: “Oh, do you have a bread machine?”

    Me: “Nope, made it without one.”

    Coworker: “That’s not possible. You HAVE TO have a bread machine to make bread.”

    Me: “How do you think your grandmother made bread before they invented bread machines?”

    Coworker: *deer in headlights look*

    (This went on over and over because she simply refused to believe it was possible for someone to make bread without using a bread machine.)

    Detail Disoriented

    | Darien, CT, USA | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, New Hires

    (I decide to work with a recruiter. I’m sent to a small business for the interview. The owners, a wife and husband, are running late. After about 20 min they’re ready for me. After the usual interview back and forth the wife grills me a bit more.)

    Wife: *with narrow beady eyes* “So, what adjectives would you use to describe yourself relating to work?”

    Me: “Detail-oriented! Because I have a strong economics background, I know how critical micro-components can be with respect to macro-implications!”

    Wife: *stares*

    Me: “I’m also very diligent and strive for excellence in everything I do. Whether it be in my personal, academic, or professional life. Oh and I think it’s important to think outside the box and not always adhere for rigidity’s sake.”

    Wife: “Uh-huh.”

    Me: “Oh, and I’m not sure if you remember me? We took a class together back at [Local Community College] before I transferred to [Prestigious Local University]?”

    Wife: *becoming flustered* “Oh, no, I don’t recall. I was just improving my skill-set to help me run MY BUSINESS.”

    (The interview ends shortly after that. I thought all in all it went well. I would’ve taken the job short term for the money but wasn’t particularly interested; more on that soon. A couple of days later I follow up with the recruiter.)

    Recruiter: “How did it go for you?”

    Me: “Pretty good. I feel well qualified.”

    Recruiter: “Well [Wife] didn’t really give rave reviews. She said you put her off because you said you had OCD.”

    Me: “What? I used the words ‘detailed-oriented’ and ‘diligent.’ And this was for an accounting position!”

    Recruiter: “I wouldn’t worry about it. She didn’t like anyone I sent to her and decided to delegate the role among existing staff.”

    (So why wasn’t I thrilled about the job in the first place? In that class I took with her, the owner proved to be one the dizziest, scatter-brained people I have ever met! She completely flunked the class despite seeking help from classmates – including me!)

    Game Over For This Store

    | MI, USA | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, Technology, Theme Of The Month

    (I work at a small video game shop that sells new and used games as well as new and used consoles. This includes retro consoles. We have, on display, many different consoles and games. Our business is set up so that if we have a game or console in stock customers can play any game before buying, and can trade in pretty much any game regardless of console. In fact, it was even in the name of the business that someone could trade and play games. We also do console repairs. Along with working the floor, I’m the only person who repairs these consoles. The owner of the business, however, starts getting more and more restricting toward customers.)

    Boss: “So, everyone, the new policy is that customers cannot play any games unless they are going to buy it.”

    Me: “How do we know they are going to buy it, or for that matter how do the customers know if they are going to buy the game without playing it?”

    Boss: “We’re doing this so parents will not drop off kids to play games and leave us to babysit.”

    Me: “But that’s half of our customers that would buy video games.”

    Boss: “Just don’t let people play games!”

    (The boss posts a big sign in the window about this and, as a result, we lose about half of our business. He also fires most of my coworkers within two weeks, leaving just four of us.)

    Boss: “Okay, everyone. Since we’ve somehow lost a lot of business, you’ll notice I’ve had to let some of your coworkers go. We’re also not going to host any more of the weekly game tournaments.”

    Coworker #1: “But those tournaments bring in more money in two hours than any other whole day!”

    Boss: “Well, we aren’t going to do them any more. We aren’t bringing in a lot, so I can’t afford to have all of you here at once for tournaments. That’s final.”

    Coworker #2: “What about new releases? We’ve lost a lot of customers to [Big Chain Competitor] because we haven’t gotten in any new releases this week.”

    Boss: “I didn’t buy any of the new releases this week. I don’t want to buy any more new releases until we get more sales. We don’t have enough customers so we can’t afford to just have these on the shelf. That’s why we are also stopping all trades. We need to move this old stuff before we take in any trades. I don’t want a single trade in unless it’s for some other old thing. Trades are no longer allowed to be used towards newer games.”

    Me: *after we all unsuccessfully tried to reason with him* “And what about repair parts? I have about 40 consoles that have been here for weeks and I still haven’t gotten the parts in. Can you check on the parts for me?”

    Boss: “I’ll buy you those parts. Just give me a list of what you need.”

    (I give my boss the same list of parts I had given him weeks before. Since he didn’t want more than one person working at a time, I was put on repairs only. This meant I was only paid commission on repairs. After four total weeks of no parts and no paychecks, I went to the store to talk to him.)

    Me: “[Coworker #1], have you seen [Boss]? And I thought [Coworker #3] was working today.”

    Coworker #1: “No, I haven’t seen [Boss], and [Coworker #3] quit. He was yelled at for locking up the place so he could go to the bathroom.”

    Me: “So let me get this straight. He was forced to work all alone from opening until closing and got yelled at for locking the door so he could go into the back to pee?”

    Coworker #1: “Yep. I’m just glad I’m actually getting paid.”

    Me: “Yeah. I’m still waiting on those parts to come in and I haven’t gotten a paycheck in a month!”

    Coworker #1: “He hasn’t talked to you?! He said he wasn’t going to order them until we had more sales.”

    Me: “What?! So [Boss] has stopped letting people play games, stopped hosting game tournaments, stopped buying new releases, stopped taking in trades, and stopped console repairs?! And he expects more customers and more sales?!”

    (I printed some receipt paper and wrote, ‘Since I haven’t worked for the past month, let’s make it official. I quit. Signed, [My Name]‘ and taped it to his office door. Not surprisingly, the business closed a few weeks later.)

    Dying To Get The Job

    | Kirkland, WA, USA | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, New Hires

    (I’ve recently interviewed at a local wholesaler for a position on their order and delivery team. Despite being told they would be in touch with me the following day to let me know when I could begin training, I haven’t heard anything from them for over a week so I give them a call.)

    Me: “Yes, hello. I wanted to check in again about the position I applied for. You were supposed to call me back, like, six days ago.”

    Employee: “Really? Let me check with the hiring manager.”

    (I get put on hold for several minutes. When the employee gets back he sounds noticeably uneasy.)

    Employee: “Okay. So, I don’t quite know how to say this, but apparently the hiring manager threw out your application.”

    Me: “What!? Why? You made it pretty clear I had the job when I last spoke with you!”

    Employee: “Well, here’s the thing: after that, he read in the obituary column of the local paper that someone with the same name as you passed away recently. He thought it was you and therefore decided to toss out your papers.”

    Me: *stunned* “Umm… Well, is there a way I could correct that? I mean, seeing as we’re conversing, I’m obviously not dead!”

    Employee: “I’d advise you to come in again and meet him face to face. He’s still not entirely convinced this isn’t some sort of prank.”

    (I did go back in and managed to give the hiring manager quite a shock when he stepped out of his office to see me looking alive and well. Even better? I checked the obituaries afterwards and found the guy who’d passed away was clearly stated to be in his 90s – I just barely turned 30. The manager had no explanation for why he thought a geriatric was applying for such a physically demanding position.)


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