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    Category: Extra Stupid

    Always Takes The Same Route(r)

    | UK | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I’m on call: that means that if any of my team have a problem on the weekend I have to take the call. It can be a real pain. Most of the issues are very minor and could be dealt with using common sense.)

    Me: “This is [My Name]. What’s the issue?”

    Boss: “Hi, [My Name]. Sorry for disturbing you.”

    Me: “Oh, hi, [Boss]… Why are you calling me? You don’t normally work on the weekend!”

    Boss: “I need your help. My laptop isn’t working.”

    Me: “Can’t one of the IT guys help you?”

    Boss: “No, this is at home. I need to get online.”

    (I slowly and painfully take him through several steps to connect to a router and troubleshoot, when…)

    Me: “Just humour me. Your router, are all the lights on green?”

    Boss: “No. Oh, and my phone isn’t working either.”

    Me: “Okay, well that is a provider issue. Nothing to do with your computer.”

    Boss: “Are you sure?”

    Me: “Yes. Believe me, I’m sure.”

    (I found out on Monday that he never did get online, but not before ringing up another coworker and going through the exact same steps.)

    Knows No Better Than Letter

    | OH, USA | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I work correspondence for a department in a call center. I do both emails and letters, but I do them at different parts of the day. When an employee sends a letter or email request to the wrong place, it slows both me and their mail down. After several in the same day, I send a communication to my coworker to remind him of the procedure.)

    Me: “Hey, [Coworker], please remember to send all letters to [letter inbox location].”

    Coworker: “Some of them automatically go to [email inbox].”

    Me: “Okay, which? I can get that fixed.”

    Coworker: “All of the emails.”

    Me: “But which letters?”

    Coworker: “All of the emails, it’s just the way emails go.”

    Me: “But which letters automatically go to [email inbox]?”

    Coworker: “All of the emails.”

    Me: “… I am not talking about emails. I am talking about letters. You know, print them out, fold them up, put them in envelopes?”

    Coworker: “When I send an email letter, it goes to [email inbox].”

    (At this point, I grabbed a letter off my desk, got up, and walked over to his desk to explain the difference between emails and letters. I wish it was the first time I had to explain something that simple to a coworker.)

    Should Have Been Left To Stew In Your Own Juice

    | Devon, England, UK | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I’m in the supermarket looking for tomato juice but they have run out of long-life cartons and I don’t know where the fresh juice is kept, so I find an employee.)

    Me: “Where is your fresh tomato juice, please?”

    Employee: “Uh, I have no idea.”

    Me: “…”

    Employee: *seeing this is not making me go away* “Uh… it might be with the bottled soy sauce and stuff?”

    Me: “No,it’ll be refrigerated. FRESH tomato juice?”

    (The employee then wanders over to a nearby chilled cabinet, looks around for a bit and then triumphantly holds up a tub of tomato and basil spaghetti sauce.)

    Employee: “Here you go!”

    Me: “Umm… no…”

    Desk-Side Disservice

    | MI, USA | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid

    (According to the courier service, a packet of documents my boss needs arrived four days earlier. He’s been around our small office searching with no luck. I slip into the conference room while he’s taking a call and slip the packet, still in its envelope, in front of him.)

    Boss: *to caller* “Hold on one second.” *mutes the call and turns to me* “Where did you find this?”

    Me: “It was in your trash can.”

    (My boss looks bewildered and goes back to his call. He finishes and comes up to my desk.)

    Boss: “Did you sign for this when it arrived?”

    Me: “I think so.”

    Boss: “And you just put it on my desk? You can’t do that! This is extremely important stuff. It can’t be left just anywhere. Look what just happened! Next time you get a delivery, put it somewhere safe!”

    (By this point I’m trying desperately not to laugh. My boss notices, and realizes what he’s just told me.)

    Boss: “Uhm, so… don’t trust me, the owner of this place, with the important stuff. Next time, give it to [His Wife] instead.”

    Can’t State This Enough

    | USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Geography

    (My family and I take a vacation to Block Island, off the coast of Rhode Island. Rhode Island is a very small state, but a state nonetheless. While out kayaking, my dad loses his wallet, including his credit cards. When we get home he calls the credit card company to cancel his card.)

    Rep: “Okay, sir, where were you when you lost your credit card?”

    Dad: “I was on Block Island. That’s a part of Rhode Island.”

    Rep: “Thank you, sir. And what state is Rhode Island in?”

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