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    Category: At The Checkout

    Needs That Coffee More Than You Do

    | Vancouver Island, BC, Canada | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (My stepdad is a vegetarian, but when he goes out of town for work he stops at a well-known burger chain for coffee. Nothing else, just coffee. As most people may know, these chains often have their employees ‘upsell’ certain products.)

    Worker: “Hi, how can I help you?”

    Stepdad: “Medium coffee, please. Two cream, one sugar.”

    Worker: “And would you like to try our home-brewed coffee today?”


    Stepdad: “Long day?”

    Worker: “I’ve been here since 10…”

    The Employee And The Hummus Have A Code

    | ACT, Australia | At The Checkout, Employees, Technology

    (My husband and I are shopping for groceries and find my preferred hummus is on sale, with a weird really long barcode on it. I wonder if it will cause problems at the checkout, but grab two anyway. When we are done shopping we head to the self-serve checkouts. Note there is one staff member for nine of these checkouts.)

    Me: *gets up to hummus and it won’t scan* “D***, it doesn’t like my hummus!”

    (I try scanning it a few more times and then give up. I look around for the staff member. Just then the staff member walks by me and tells her nearest colleague that she is ducking out. My hand is up to signal her but I drop it, presuming she hasn’t seen me. On her way out she looks back and makes eye contact with me before hurrying away.)

    Me: *deflated* “Well, what the h*** do I do now?”

    (The machine, which had been mostly silent, suddenly speaks up…)

    Machine: “Type in the code, or look up item.”

    (My husband and I look at each other before bursting out laughing. I type in the massive code, and it works. I then have to repeat this for the other hummus. Luckily the sale price is applied properly and I don’t have to retype it. We finish up, pay and collect our groceries. As we are walking out, the staff member comes back into the store, and quickly averts her eyes.)

    Me: “Did she somehow intuitively know my hummus was a problem and avoided us?”

    Husband: *shrug* “It doesn’t matter; the machine knew what was going on.”

    Not Handing Over Justice

    | OR, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

    (Many cashiers have a pet peeve about customers placing money on the counter when we have our hand ready to take it. Usually this doesn’t bother me much, but one night I am closing my store and it is nearing the end of my shift…)

    Me: “Do you have your [Store] card or phone number ma’am?”

    Customer: “Yes, I have my card somewhere…”

    Me: *reaches hand out to accept her card as she pulls it out of her wallet*

    Customer: *throws her card on the belt next to my hand, making it hard for me to pick up*

    Me: “Okay, your total comes to $7.59. Will you be paying cash or card this evening?”

    Customer: “I think I have some cash on me.”

    Me: *once again reaches hand out to accept the cash she has found*

    Customer: *throws cash on counter*

    Me: “All righty, 41 cents is your change. Would you like your receipt?”

    Customer: “Please…” *reaches out hand to take her receipt*

    Me: *puts receipt on the counter right next to her hand* “Have a nice night!”

    Wasn’t In The Top Percentile Of His Class

    | CA, USA | At The Checkout, Employees, Extra Stupid, Math & Science

    (I work in a large import store that sold things like furniture and dishes. Most of these things are handmade, and so each is a little different. A customer has been in the store for a while, buying a variety of things but demanding discounts on everything for every ‘flaw.’ He is finally done, has paid and is leaving but spotted one last thing, a $90 wicker chair. I have to go ask my manager, yet again, if I can give him a discount.)

    Me: *to my manager* “He doesn’t like the weave and wants a discount.”

    Manager: “Fine! If it will get him out of here, you can give him ten bucks off.”

    (I return and tell him I can give him ten dollars off the price.)

    Customer: “Ten dollars? NO, I want ten PERCENT!”

    Me: “Okay, sir, whatever you say.”

    (I ring up the $90 chair, with his 10% discount, nine dollars off. He left happy, smug in his victory.)

    Wasn’t In The Top Percentile Of Her Class

    Hats Off To Recognition Skills

    , | USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly

    (I would regularly get Chinese food from the mall before work. I always wore the same black and white hat to work except on days off when I switched it out with a pink and white one. I notice the girl I regularly buy from giving me weird looks as she rings up my food.)

    Me: *finally realizing what the looks are for* “Different hat.”


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