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    Category: Coworkers

    They’re All Irresponsible For This

    | WA, Australia | Bizarre/Silly, Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, Language & Words, Technology

    (I work as a general staff member at a university. My department constantly has to liaise with the enrollment department to ensure both sides are up to date with all procedures. Colleague #1, in the enrollments department, and I are noted to be the youngest employees in the University as we are in our very early 20s. Both of our departments are very relaxed and good natured with each other.)

    Me: *walking in and seeing a manager in the enrollment team’s room* “Um, can I interrupt?”

    Manager: “Sure.”

    Me: “I need help. I am looking for a responsible adult.”

    (There is a short pause and the team and manager start laughing.)

    Manager: “Well, you’ve come to the wrong place.”

    Colleague #2: *still laughing* “Such a hopeless quest.”

    Colleague #3: “There is no one here that can help you then.”

    (Everyone starts to come down.)

    Me: “Oh, don’t worry. I am sure [Colleague #1] can help me.”

    Colleague #1: “Sure.”

    (Everyone starts laughing.)

    Colleague #2: “She’s the youngest here!”

    Manager: “It must be about technology.”

    Colleague #1: *with a big smile on her face* “How can I help you?”

    Me: “Oh, I just need help with this ‘interwebs’ thing.”

    (The manager is now cracking up.)

    Colleague #3: “See, it was a technology thing! I don’t even know what that is.”

    Colleague #4: “Interwebs? What is that?”

    Me: “Um, it’s another way to say Internet that will confuse people.”

    (There was a short bout of silence before Colleague #3 and #4 cracked up about the ‘interwebs’)

    Coworker Not Coworking

    | NJ, USA | Coworkers, Math & Science

    (I am waiting to punch in for the day. As I am, one of my coworkers is having a issues with an item. Another coworker is helping her out.)

    Coworker #1: “So, do you know how to do this?”

    Coworker #2: “I have not done this type of math since like the 5th grade! No. Hey, [Coworker #3] get over here!”

    (Coworker #3 goes over, and he is having issues. I walk over, still not punched in.)

    Coworker #1: “Oh, [My Name] is here! She is good at this stuff!”

    Me: “What is the issue?”

    Coworker #1: “So, the customer bought three things of meat. It is on sale saying that if you buy them, one will be $1.99 per pound, and the rest $2.99. It took off for the $1.99 but not the $2.99.”

    (I grab a calculator and walk over to the customer’s cart. I look at the meat to see how much per pound it is so I can do math. It is already $2.99 per pound.)

    Me: “Hey, [Coworker #1], get over here!”

    (She comes and I point it out to her.)

    Coworker #1: “Haha, oops. This is why you are here!”

    Me: “Really, like what do you guys do when I am NOT here?”

    Coworker #3: “Pray and hope for the best.”

    Oh Mulch, Did We Pay For The Crap?

    | MN, USA | Coworkers

    (I work for a company that does native plantings, mostly on private properties. This particular day, my coworker and I are bringing a load of mulch to a private property which we picked up from another retailer on our way there. This conversation happened as we are unloading it.)

    CoWorker: “Oh, crap!”

    Me: “What?”

    CoWorker: “Did we pay for the mulch?”

    Me: “Well… they know who we are. They’ll send us a bill.”

    They’ll Have Your Skin For This

    | Dunedin, New Zealand | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Food & Drink

    (I work in a very depressing call centre. One of my friends is moving desks so as a joke I tape a banana to the underside of his desk so he would find it while he was cleaning. He ends up not moving. About a year later, after I had completely forgotten about it…)

    Coworker: “What the h*** is this?”

    (He held up a shriveled black banana skin. I don’t want to know where the actual banana I left in the skin went.)

    A Sizeable Innuendo

    | IA, USA | Coworkers, Rude & Risque

    (At the garment factory where I work, Coworker #1 is having trouble fitting some parts together and asks our lead for help.)

    Coworker #1: “[Lead], why won’t this fit?”

    Lead: “Look at the labels. You’ve got two different sizes. That’s right, girls! Sometimes size does matter!”

    (Coworker #2 and I burst into laughter.)

    Lead: “Oh, hush, you two! An extra large won’t fit in a medium.”

    Me: “[Lead], you’re not helping your cause.”


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