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    Category: Coworkers

    Tip-Top Dancing

    | KY, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Theme Of The Month

    (I’ve always been oblivious to the people around me and hard to embarrass. Not in a bad way but I’ll frequently find myself dancing to music being played in a public place (like a grocery store) or making weird faces at my coworkers within clear view of customers. This happened as I was putting in an order for one of my tables. Note: the music in the restaurant was a mix of 80s and 90s pop – pretty much what I grew up listening to.)

    Coworker: “Hey! My table wants to ask you something.”

    Me: “Okay… What is it? Is it bad?”

    Coworker: “Just come over here.”

    Me: *to table of guests* “Hi! What can I do for you?”

    Table: “Hey! Yeah, we were wondering if you could do that dance you were just doing again?!”

    Me: “What?”

    Coworker: “Yeah, when you were putting in your tables’ order you were dancing to the song…”

    Me: “Oh!” *blushing* “Did it go like this…?”

    (I do a pared down version of what I think I was doing earlier.)

    Table: “Yeah! That was it! Thanks so much. That’s hilarious!”

    (They ended up leaving me a $5 tip with my coworker!)

    Don’t Fall Behind On The Schedule

    | Cincinnati, OH, USA | Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (I work in a meat department at a big name store. None of the people who work at night are trained to use the saws, so they start having one of the trained people come in at night. We never really know which one, so we have a tendency to ask another night clerk in the department.)

    Me: *stocking the cases*

    Coworker: “Hey, who’s working with us tonight?”

    Me: “[Department Head].”

    Coworker: “D*** it! I hate working with him!”!

    Me: “Um…”

    Coworker: “It’s just so annoying!”

    Me: “…he’s right behind you.”

    Department Head: *stocking another shelf nearby, and turns to say* “That was actually pretty funny!”

    Needs A New Motherboard

    | PA, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Technology

    (Part of our job as a help desk agent is, unfortunately, having to set up new users in a few programs. One program in particular only allows one session, so oftentimes, we end up getting kicked out by each other. I happen to witness this exchange.)

    Coworker: “Anyone in [Program]?”

    Team Leader: “I think your mom was.”

    The Number Must Have Popsicled Into Their Head

    , | New Zealand | Coworkers, Employees, Extra Stupid

    (I am eight at the time. I go to the gas station retailer to buy two popsicles, which cost 99c each. I have a “buy one get one free” card for the popsicles, but when I buy two I am charged $1.98. I thought there was an increase in price so I just leave, but I mention it to my dad in the car.  My dad tells me off and makes me go back in to the cashier with the receipt.)

    Me: “Um. Excuse me, how much is this popsicle?”

    Cashier #1: “99c.”

    Me: *startled* “Then why did I get charged $1.98?”

    Cashier #1: “Because you bought two.”

    Me: “But I have a ‘get one free’ card!”

    Cashier #1: “Okay, I’ll try again.” *points to popsicle #1* “This popsicle is 99c.”

    Me: “Okay…”

    Cashier #1: “And you get this one:” *points to popsicle 2* “…for free.”

    Me: “Yes…?”

    Cashier #1: “So the price is $1.98.”

    Me: “Huh?”

    (Cashier #2, beside Cashier #1, overhears the entire conversation and interjects.)

    Cashier #2: “Here, son, I’ll fix it for you…”

    (Cashier #1 remained confused after I left the store with my change.)

    Got The Innuendo In The End-o

    | IL, USA | Coworkers, Language & Words, Rude & Risque

    (We have just received a shipment of office supplies, including some small pieces of furniture which require some assembly. I volunteer to build them, only to find that tools were not included with the parts.)

    Me: “Hey, does anyone know if we have a little wrench or something here?”

    Coworker #1: “Um, I don’t know. Why?”

    Me: “Oh, I’m putting together our new stuff, but they didn’t include any tools.”

    Coworker #1: *starting to giggle* “Um, so you need a little tool?”

    Coworker #2: *also starting to laugh* “I’m not sure I have any tool to give you.”

    Me: *not getting the joke* “Well, I just need, like, a wrench or something. I have to tighten my nuts.”

    (Both of my coworkers lose it as I realize what I’ve just said.)

    Me: “You both are horrible!”

    (Later, after I’ve finished assembling the furniture, I got them back.)

    Me: “There! All done! I just needed the right tool for my nuts!”


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