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    Category: Employees

    The Post Snail-Mail Generation

    , | CA, USA | Employees, Technology

    (I work in a call center at a help desk for a bank, assisting representatives with problems and doing research. Often we get asked how systems work or how to find something. I’m in Colorado; the person calling is in California.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [Company] help desk. This is [My Name]. How can I help today?”

    Teller: “I’m trying to write a letter in Google but it’s not letting me.”

    Me: “What do you mean, you’re trying to write a letter in Google?”

    Teller: “I’m trying to write a letter to go with a check we’re returning to the client, but Google won’t let me do it.”

    Me: “You need to use a word processor, not Google.”

    Teller: “But I can type. Why won’t it let me write a letter?”

    Me: “Let me just write that letter for you.”

    Teller: “Then how will I get it? Will you drop it on my desk?”

    Me: “I can email it to you.”

    Teller: “Then how will the client get it?”

    Me: “You can print it off and mail it to them with the check.”

    Teller: “How do I mail a letter?”

    (It just kept going like this for 10 minutes. Sadly, this is not the first or last time I’ve had to explain how to mail a letter.)

    Not So Nuts About The Management

    | Boca Raton, FL, USA | Employees, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    Me: “I’d like the three-piece dark, please. With baked apples for one side and, oh, is there an ingredient list to see if the sweet potato streusel topping has nuts, like walnuts or pecans?”

    Employee #1: “Are you allergic to all nuts?”

    Me: “No, just tree nuts. I’m not allergic to peanuts.”

    Employee #1: “Let me check. [Employee #2], where can we check the ingredient lists?”

    Employee #2: “It’s in this binder. What is she looking for?”

    Employee #1: “Tree nuts.”

    Employee #2: “I don’t see that listed at all. I see peanuts. So no, she shouldn’t have that.”

    Me: “I’m not allergic to peanuts.”

    Employee #1: “Okay, great, so you can have the sweet potatoes. Is that what you’d like?”

    Me: “Yes, please. Thanks for checking.”

    Employee #2: “But it says it may contain peanuts! Why are you giving it to her!?”

    Employee #1: “Because it has peanuts, and she’s not allergic to peanuts.”

    Employee #2: “But it’s in the name! Pea-NUT. It’s a nut!”

    Employee #1: “She’s okay with it, [Employee #2]!” *turns to me* “Would you like anything else?”

    Me: “Yeah, could I get an extra side of mac and cheese for my daughter?”

    Employee #1: “Sure!”

    (I go to get rung up at the register, and there’s a problem.)

    Employee #1: “Hey, [Employee #2], can you help me out?”

    Employee #2: “Oh, yeah, you need a manager’s card to void it out.” *takes card out of pocket, swipes*

    (When my husband, daughter and I sit down to eat, I turn to my husband.)

    Me: “Wait, the one who didn’t know that peanuts aren’t a tree nut is the manager?!”

    Making Minor Adjustments

    | Portland, OR, USA | Employees, Transportation

    (I’m traveling solo, visiting my sister out west, and during my return journey I decide to use a check-in kiosk since I don’t have much luggage. I do, however, have my stuffed cat out for a photography project. The woman in front of me was having trouble using the kiosk, so an airport employee has come to help her. When she’s done, I step up, but the employee doesn’t leave. Note that I’m 21 but often told I look younger.)

    Employee: “Good morning.”

    Me: “Good morning!”

    Employee: “Where to?”

    Me: “[Airport].”

    Employee: “Okay, can I see your boarding pass?”

    (I’m a bit confused, since no one else had to get theirs checked, but since he works there I figure he has a reason, so I hand him my pass. He gets on to the kiosk and starts doing everything for me. Again, I’m not sure why, but logic it out that perhaps there’s something up with the machine.)

    Employee: “And can I see your ID?”

    Me: “Uh… sure.” *hands over my VERY well-worn but recognizable college student ID*

    Employee: “I meant I like a driver’s license or passport or…” *pause as he realizes what he’s holding* “Wait, how old are you?!”

    Me: “21.”

    Employee: “…Oh.”

    (He looked rather embarrassed after that and allowed me to finish on my own. Apparently with the stuffed cat he thought I was a minor traveling alone and didn’t know how to work the machine!)

    They Have A Drinking Problem

    | Lubbock, TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Employees, Food & Drink, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (We have just ordered two combo meals which come with drinks. We get to the second window and receive our meals, but only one drink. Mind that both meals had their fries, and thus had been marked as combos.)

    Husband: “Ma’am, were missing a drink.”

    Server: “All right, let me get that for you, sir.”

    (We wait two minutes.)

    Server: “You’re the ones with the [someone else’s order]?”

    Us: “No, ma’am, we’re waiting on a drink.”

    (She disappears for another two minutes.)

    Server: “All right, so you’re the [other order].”

    Husband: “…No, we’re still just waiting for a drink.”

    (By now, we’ve in the drive through line for at least 10 minutes.)

    Server: “All right, well, we didn’t put the drink on the order, so—”

    Husband: “…Well, here’s my card. Charge what you need to for the drink.”

    Server: *takes the card* “No one needs that attitude, sir.”

    (My husband and I look at each other puzzled, but we give up. We get a drink and his card back and head off.)

    Husband: *takes a sip of his drink once we’re at home* “…This is the wrong drink.”

    Great Scott, Chewie!

    | Folkestone, Kent, UK | Employees, Geeks Rule, Movies & TV

    (I’m getting my haircut by Barber #1. Barber #2 is nearby drinking tea as there are no other customers in the shop. Barber #1 and I are talking about the ‘Back to the Future’ trilogy, especially as it is now 2015, the year that Marty and Doc visit in ‘Back to the Future Part II.’)

    Me: “Shame, we won’t have our hoverboards this year.”

    Barber #1: “I know! But…”

    Barber #2: “Is that really hairy guy still in it?”

    (Blank looks.)

    Barber #2: “You know; the one with hair everywhere?”

    Me: “Do you mean Doc? Yeah, he’s been in all of them.”

    Barber #2: “No, the really hairy one. You know…” *makes Wookie noise*

    Me: “Um, Chewbacca? I think he’s going to be in the new Star Wars film this year.”

    Barber #1: “But we weren’t talking about them. We were talking about Back to the Future.”

    Barber #2: “Were you? Oh, okay.”

    Me: *to Barber #1* “I know Doc Brown’s hair is wild, but to confuse him with Chewbacca…”


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