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    Category: Employees

    BLT, Better Luck Tomorrow, Part 2

    | Edmonton, AB, Canada | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I’m at the coffee/sandwich shop next door to where I work. The barista at the till is sort of new, but I assumed she had a good handle on things by now.)

    Me: “Hello, I’d like a BLT.”

    Barista: “So, sausage on that, right?”

    Me: “That would make it an SLT.”

    Barista: “No, it’s a BLT. Says so on the board.”

    (A few seconds pass.)

    Barista: “…Oh, I get it! The bacon kind, then.”

    Bigotry Is A Bitter Pill To Swallow

    | Seattle, WA, USA | Bigotry, Employees, Health & Body

    (I am at a health clinic trying to get some care. I am a transgender man, so this sometimes proves aggravating.)

    Nurse: “So, what are you here for again?”

    Me: “I need to be on the pill or get an IUD.”

    Nurse: *after giving me the side-eye* “Um, no.”

    Me: “I get that I don’t look like a woman, but I assure you I can still get pregnant.”

    Nurse: “Yeah, I’m going to have to go ask the doctor what to do here.”

    Me: “Really?”

    (I sit for the next 20 minutes as they ‘sort it out.’)

    Nurse: “I talked to the doctor, and he’s not comfortable treating you at all.”

    (Turned out they didn’t want to give me contraception at all. I ended up going to the local Planned Parenthood who were more than happy to serve a transgender man, and had cheaper, more abundant, options anyway. I still had to pay for that crap doctor’s appointment, too.)

    Death Of A Sales Pitch, Part 4

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Employees, Family & Kids

    (It’s early in the morning before my college classes start. The phone rings as I am making my breakfast.)

    Caller: “Hello. May I speak with Gloria?”

    Me: *laughs* “Sure.”

    (I proceed to hold the phone up to the mantle in our living room, where my grandmother’s ashes sit. I can hear him go off on his script, pause, and call ‘Ma’am?’ several times. I give him a break.)

    Me: “Sir, my grandmother is dead. The only way you could possibly be unaware of that is if you’re selling something. My toast is done. I need to go.”

    (I hung up on him and went back to my morning routine.)

    Death Of A Sales Pitch, Part 3
    Death Of A Sales Pitch, Part 2
    Death Of A Sales Pitch

    Troubleshooting Has Bad Aim

    | VA, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Technology

    (I call my Internet provider because my service is off-line. I navigate through an automated menu that has me confirm my service is totally dead and I am unable to get online. I’m put on hold to wait for a technician.)

    Recorded Message: “While you wait, you may review our troubleshooting tips online at www. …”

    Me: *to myself* “WHY did I just spend two minutes confirming my Internet was off-line?”

    Vegetarians Often Go Without

    , | Fort Wayne, IN, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (I am a vegetarian, and often order my meals without meat. I go through a popular fast food drive through to order one of their popular breakfast sandwiches and specify what needs altered.)

    Me: “Hey there! I’d like a [popular breakfast sandwich] without meat, and a large orange juice, please.”

    Worker: “A [popular breakfast sandwich]?”

    Me: “Yep! Without meat.”

    Worker: “Do you want it without Canadian bacon or without sausage?”

    Me: “… Whatever’s cheaper?”

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