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    Category: Family & Kids

    But Her Credit Score Is Alive And Well

    | TX, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Family & Kids

    (My aunt died this past January. Her bank bills her for February and March for their monthly service charge on her credit card, and then adds late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00… and now is somewhere around $60.00.)

    Me: “I am calling to tell you that she died in January.”

    Bank: “The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply.”

    Me: “Maybe you should turn it over to collections…”

    Bank: “Since it is two months past due, it already has been.”

    Me: “So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?”

    Bank: “Either report her account to the frauds division, or report her to the credit bureau… Maybe both!”

    Me: “Do you think God will be mad at her?”

    Bank: “Excuse me…?”

    Me: “Did you get what I am telling you… the part about her being dead?”

    Bank: “Sir, you’ll have to speak to my supervisor!”

    (Supervisor gets on the phone.)

    Me: ”I’m calling to tell you she died in January.”

    Bank Supervisor: “The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply.”

    Me: “You mean you want to collect from her estate?”

    Bank Supervisor: *stammers* “Are you her lawyer?”

    Me: “No, I’m her great nephew.” *gives lawyer info*

    Bank Supervisor: “Could you fax us a certificate of death?”

    Me: “Sure.” *fax number is given*

    (After they get the fax:)

    Bank Supervisor: “Our system just isn’t setup for death…”

    Me: “Oh…”

    Bank Supervisor: “I don’t know what more I can do to help…”

    Me: “Well… if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her, I suppose… I don’t really think she will care.”

    Bank Supervisor: “Well… the late fees and charges do still apply.”

    Me: “‘Would you like her new billing address?”

    Bank Supervisor: “That might help.”

    Me: “Odessa Memorial Cemetery.” *gives plot number*

    Bank Supervisor: “Sir, that’s a cemetery!”

    Me: “What do you do with dead people on your planet?!”

    Sending Her Anxiety The Way Of The Dinosaurs

    | England, UK | Awesome Workers, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (I’m a young adult with severe anxiety issues, so I always get a bit nervous going out in public. Once a week I meet my sister at a local cafe, but because I have to wait for her to arrive I’m always worried I’ll get called out for not having ordered anything when I sit down. I also always carry a stuffed toy dinosaur with me for comfort. When a server comes over to me, I think I’m about to be kicked out, so I probably look terrified.)

    Server: *speaking gently* “You know, I see you come in here a lot, and I just wanted to say I love your dinosaur! Seeing him always makes me want to work extra hard. He makes me so happy.”

    Me: “Well… he is a carnivore, so… if you slack off he’ll probably eat you.”

    Server: “Oh, consider myself warned! And I just wanted you to know you don’t have to be nervous, dear. We know your friend is coming. Is she buying you cake today?”

    Me: *nods*

    Server: “Good for you. I’d better get back to work before I get eaten!”

    (She smiles at me every time I come in now, and I’m no longer nervous about sitting and waiting for my sister!)

    A World Plush With Lies

    | Lafayette, LA, USA | Bosses & Owners, Family & Kids

    (The store I work in is located in a mall, and despite being a candy store we also sell plush toys, with a display set up at the front of the store. Because of this, small children will often fuss at their parents to buy them said toys as they pass by on their way to or from other stores. A little boy wants a stuffed penguin, which his mother pries from his hands despite his protests.)

    Mother: “We’ll get it on the way back!”

    (Sulking, the boy follows his mother away from our store.)

    Manager: *laughing* “So many LIES! When will it END?!”

    This Parrot Is Sketchy

    | ON, Canada | Employees, Family & Kids, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (My grandmother died on April 9th, of natural causes. My grandfather then died on April 10th, the day after, also of natural causes. My family is clearing out their condo because we have only until the 30th to do so. The phone in their house starts ringing.)

    Aunt: *picks up the phone* “Hello?”

    Telemarketer: “I need to speak to [Grandmother] or [Grandfather].”

    Aunt: “I’m sorry, but they’re deceased.”

    Telemarketer: “I need to speak to one of them.”

    Aunt: “You can’t; they’re both deceased.”

    (This goes back and forth a couple of times, my aunt keeping her cool, which is surprising because she isn’t known for her tolerance of stupidity.)

    Telemarketer: “I don’t think you understand; I need to talk to [Grandmother] or [Grandfather]!”

    My Aunt: “No, you don’t understand! THEY’RE DECEASED! THEY’RE WITH GOD NOW! THEY BOUGHT THE FARM! THEY CROAKED! THEY DEPARTED! THEY’RE DEAD!”

    Telemarketer: “…” *click*

    My Aunt: “B**** hung up on me!”

    (No sorry for your loss or anything!)

    The Signal Strength Is Just Heavenly

    | CA, USA | Employees, Family & Kids, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (We are the customers in this story. My dad, grandma, and I are adding my grandma’s line to our account after my grandpa passed away.)

    Employee: “We’ll need to just verify with your husband that we can do the line transfer since he is the primary on the account.”

    Grandma: “Let me know if you get a good connection!”


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