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    Category: Geeks Rule

    My Internet Has Gone All Adava Kedavra

    | Brooklyn, NY, USA | Awesome Workers, Coworkers, Employees, Geeks Rule, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (I recently moved across the country from California to New York. I’ve filed a move request with my ISP but don’t have an Internet connection when I arrive in my new apartment, so I call them up to try to resolve this. After giving them all my information, they explain the problem.)

    Customer Service #1: “Okay, so I’m looking at your order here. I see that two weeks ago you opened a new account with us.”

    Me: “Well, I moved. Does that count as a new account?”

    Customer Service #1: “Well, you can process it like that, or just as a move. It’s up to you.”

    Me: “I don’t care how it’s done; I just want to get online in my new apartment.”

    Customer Service #1: “You should be online as of yesterday. Have you tried restarting your router?”

    Me: “Yes, and my computer. There’s no connection.”

    Customer Service #1: “Well, something MUST be wrong on your end, because I see here that we started Internet service at [California address] yesterday.”

    Me: “No, that’s my OLD address. I don’t live there any more.”

    Customer Service #1: “Uhh… hold on.”

    Customer Service #2: “Hello, my name is [Name]. Unfortunately, ma’am, we can’t turn your Internet service on at [California address] because you have yet to pass a credit check.”

    Me: “Huh? I already passed that when I first got my connection, and I don’t live there anymore!”

    Customer Service #2: “It doesn’t matter if you don’t live there. You still need to pass the check.”

    Me: “I’m trying to add service at [New York address], not [California address].”

    Customer Service #2: “Well, I’m afraid I can’t help you with that. Please hold.”

    Customer Service #3: “Hi, my name is [Name]. I’m sorry, but I’m a bit confused. Why are you opening a second account if you already have an account?”

    Me: “I’m not! I’m moving from [California address] to [New York address]. Something went wrong when I filed the move request.”

    Customer Service #3: “Something sure DID go wrong! Okay, I’ve put an order in to move your old account to your new address. We have to deal with this new order someone put in place.”

    Me: “Okay. Can we just cancel it?”

    Customer Service #3: “Hmm… no, I can’t cancel it because the credit check is still pending. You know what though? I can resolve this.” *I hear her typing for a few seconds* “There we go. I can’t cancel it, but I’m allowed to update it. Let’s see if they pass a credit check for Mr. Lord Voldemort, with no social security number, at address #1 Please Cancel This Order Road.”

    (My Internet turns on soon, and I don’t hear any more of the issue for a few days until I get a phone call asking me to rate my customer service interaction.)

    Phone Robot: “Thank you for taking the time to fill out this survey. Please press ‘1’ if I am speaking to: LORD VOLDEMORT.”

    I Want To Return This Item To The Past

    | Cambridge, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly, Employees, Geeks Rule

    (I am an artist working primarily with fancy art markers that you buy individually. I am looking for a particular color marker I need to finish a project. The first store I visit is sold out so I go to a second store.)

    Cashier: *after searching the inventory* “Yeah, sorry. It looks like we’re sold out of that color right now.”

    Me: “The last store was out of that color, too. Someone out there must also be doing a marker project and is using a large amount of the exact color I need and they came in and bought all of this color marker in all the art supply stores before me!”

    Cashier: “MAYBE IT WAS YOU FROM THE FUTURE!”

    Me: *bursts out laughing*

    Cashier: *shrugs* “I just thought I’d throw a plot twist in there.”

    (I’ve never laughed so hard at not finding what I wanted.)

    Thinking Outside The Boxes

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Coworkers, Geeks Rule

    (We are stocking a new store right in the centre of Sydney. As each truckload of stock comes in we have to unload it very quickly as a public laneway is blocked. We then have to stuff as much of it into a lift as possible.)

    Coworker: *slotting a box into a space* “To think my parents said all those hours I played Tetris were just a waste of time.”

    Very Bad Who-mor

    | Denver, CO, USA | Coworkers, Geeks Rule

    (I’m putting store stickers on merchandise when I pull out a hoodie that has the TARDIS from Doctor Who.)

    Me: *turns to coworker* “It’s a Doctor Whoodie!”

    Coworker: *snorts in amusement*

    A Yippee-Kay-Aye Work Day

    | Washington, DC, USA | Employees, Geeks Rule, Movies & TV

    (I press the button for the elevator and wait to go down to lunch. A couple seconds later the doors of the far elevator start to open, but awkwardly. I look and notice there are two workmen on top of the elevator car, which is about halfway down the opening, as they try to fix something. One workman is mostly hidden from view, but the second sees me looking at them.)

    Workman #1: “Don’t mind us. We’re just filming Die Hard 10.”

    Workman #2: *to Workman #1* “You’re an idiot.”


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