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    Category: Money

    Walk A Mile In My Affordable Shoes

    | ID, USA | Coworkers, Geeks Rule, Money

    (I’m the workplace nerd, and one of my hobbies is collecting Transformers figures, which I freely admit is an expensive hobby. One of the figures I ordered is sent to the wrong post office, so I request an extra half-hour for lunch to go pick it up, which my boss grants. I return to work and open the package in the break room in full view of a couple of coworkers.)

    Coworker: “So, this is what you went to pick up?”

    Me: “Yes, it is.” *holds up the figure* “Isn’t he awesome?”

    Coworker: “How much did this cost you?”

    Me: “Um… about a hundred dollars plus shipping.”

    Coworker: *snottily* “Well, if you can spend a hundred dollars on toys, I have some bills you can help me pay.”

    Me: *looks down at her feet* “And how much did your shoes cost?”

    Coworker: *dirty look*

    The Law Of Telemarketing

    , | CA, USA | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, Money

    (While interning for my college’s police department, I occasionally cover the dispatcher’s restroom breaks if they are alone. The following occurs in one such instance.)

    Me: “[College] District police department. Do you have an emergency?”

    Telemarketer: “Good evening, sir! I’m calling with [Company] home furnishings. I’m going to sell you a wonderful—”

    Me: *interrupting* “Sir, did you not hear the part about police department?”

    Telemarketer: “Of course I’m listening to you, sir. Now, I’d like to talk to you about—”

    Me: “Sir, you’ve called a police department’s emergency line. If you do not have an emergency, you need to hang up and remove this number from your system.”

    Telemarketer: “Of course, sir. Do you wish your sofas we—”

    Me: “All right, sir, you’ve left me no choice. I’m now activating the Public Safety Time Wasting system. Your company has now been charged $100 for a fraudulent call, and will be charged an additional $25 per minute until you disconnect.”

    Telemarketer: *now actually paying attention* “WAIT! What? What number did I call?”

    Me: “Sir, you called the [College] District police department’s emergency line. As I’ve said, your company is now being charged $100 plus—”

    Telemarketer: *click*

    (And no, despite the wishes of many a public safety dispatcher, there is no way to actually charge more for fraudulent calls to 911 or other emergency numbers.)

    Not Feeling Charitable Towards The Mistake

    | ON, Canada | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, Money

    (I’m 23, and I’m only five feet tall. I look very young, though I’m starting to get grey hair. My doorbell rings.)

    Me: “Hello?”

    Charity Worker: *looks at me for a second* “Oh, is your mom or dad there?”

    Me: “I can talk to you.”

    Charity Worker: “Well, I’m here to collect donations for [Charity] so I really need to speak to your mommy or daddy, all right?”

    Me: “No.” *closes door*

    (If he had just noticed I was greying and didn’t ask about my ‘mommy’ or ‘daddy’ I would have given a donation.)

    Completely Sale’d Out

    | Milwaukee, WI, USA | Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful, Money

    (After determining that the Blu-ray player I want doesn’t have outputs that will work with my old TV, I’m trying to decide whether to wait two weeks, when I’ll be able to get a new TV also, or buy the player now, because it’s on sale.)

    Me: “So, how long is this sale good for?”

    Employee: *looks at shelf tag* “Wednesday. But don’t worry; it’ll be the same price.”

    Me: “How’s that possible? Are you saying it’s not a real sale?”

    Employee: “It’s a real sale. But these are always on sale.”

    Me: “If it’s always the same price, it’s not really on sale.”

    Employee: *backpedaling* “It’s not always the same price. Once this sale is over, it’ll be a different sale.”

    Me: “So what will the price be after Wednesday?”

    Employee: “It could be higher or lower. But it could be the same.”

    Me: *laughing* “Well, that pretty much covers it.”

    Credit Us With Some Common Sense

    , | CA, USA | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, Money

    (I am working as a receptionist and we’ve been getting a lot of telemarketers. Since the message is a recording, I had started by just ignoring it, but after receiving calls from them twice a day for two weeks, I wait through the long message to see if there was an option to opt out of the service. There is and I choose it. Instead of a message saying they’ll stop calling, I hear ringing and someone picks up.)

    Telemarketer: “Hello, thank you for contacting [Credit Card Service]. How can I assist you?”

    Me: “Um, I selected the recorded option for you to stop calling us. Is this the right line?”

    Telemarketer: “Uh…”

    Me: “You’ve been sending us recorded messages for weeks. We’re not interested in accepting credit cards. Please take us off your list.”

    Telemarketer: “Are you sure? In this day and age, more people are going to have credit cards than cash. You shouldn’t limit yourself!”

    Me: “We are a law office that deals with bankruptcy cases. Most of our clients are already not paying off their credit cards. Why would we want to add OURSELVES to that list?”

    Telemarketer: *long pause*

    Me: “Please take us off your list.”

    Telemarketer: “All right, ma’am. Have a nice day!” *click*

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