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  • Laptop Flop, Part 5

    | Yorkshire, England, UK | Employees, Lazy/Unhelpful, Technology, Theme Of The Month

    (I order an apparently great half-price laptop from a nationwide PC company, after [Assistant #1] assures me they have lots in stock. She says she’ll ring me in two weeks when it arrives).

    Me: “Hi. It’s [Name]. I ordered a [model] laptop a couple of weeks ago, but I haven’t gotten a call yet. Could you tell me if it’s arrived, please?”

    Assistant #1: “Ah, no. It’s not in yet. According to the system, it’ll be four more days.”

    (One week later, I ring again.)

    Assistant #2: “There’s been some delays with the deliveries, so unfortunately it won’t be here for another month.”

    (One month later, I’m feeling pretty fed up and I’m contemplating cancelling. I get a call from the shop.)

    Assistant #1: “Hi. I’m ringing about your [model] laptop. It seems that we don’t actually have any available in stock anymore in any of our shops. We can give a full refund, though, and I’ll personally give you a 20% discount if you buy another laptop with us before the Windows 8 launch next week.”

    (I go into the store, and look at a few laptops on display.)

    Me: “Do you have this model available in store right now?”

    Assistant #2: “No, but I can order it for you! It would only be a couple of weeks until delivery.”

    Me: “No.” *I explain what happened last time* “I only want a laptop that’s already here.”

    Assistant #2: “Hmm, well we only have this other one here that’s within your price range.”

    Me: “I’ll take it.” *we go to the till* “Is [Assistant #1] here? She said she’d give me a discount for all the hassle last time.”

    Assistant #2: “She’s on holiday for two weeks.”

    Me: “Well, did she make a note of it on my cancelled order?”

    Assistant #2: “Ah… no.”

    Me: “Can I speak to your manager, please?”

    Assistant #2: “Uh… [Assistant #1] is the manager.”

    Me: *giving up* “Fine. I’ll just take the laptop and go.”

    Assistant #2: “Would you also like one of our store credit cards?”

    Me: “Are you kidding? No.”

    (It came as no surprise to hear two weeks later that the company had hit financial trouble. One good thing came out of it though: the laptop I ended up with has proved to be a good one!)

    Laptop Flop, Part 4
    Laptop Flop, Part 3
    Laptop Flop, Part 2
    Laptop Flop

    They’re Very Very Cold

    | VA, USA | Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

    (At my job we keep a large rack of hot sauces for our customers to use for their food, with the bottles marked with a number 1 through 10 on a scale of how hot they are. While organizing and restocking them my coworkers have the following exchange:)

    Coworker #1: “Hey. So, how do they figure out how to number how hot these are?”

    Coworker #2: “I think they take someone’s temperature before having the hot sauce, then take it again after.”

    The Price Isn’t Right

    | MO, USA | Coworkers, Criminal/Illegal, Money

    (While the store manager is away on vacation, the owner of the group of stores is sitting at his desk, which is on a platform that gives complete views of the store. In the past, my fellow counter rep and I have noticed the store manager and a few customers making some odd comings and goings to an always-locked store room. A customer comes up to the counter.)

    Customer: “I need one of those linear amplifiers from the back room. I get ‘[Store Manager]‘s price.’”

    (The owner gets up, comes down to our area and says:)

    Owner: “Tell me more about ‘[Store Manager]‘s price.’”

    (The store manager’s return from vacation was awe-inspiring to watch.)

    Introducing Not Always Friendly!

    | Not Always Friendly | Announcements

    Not Always FriendlyHey Friends, check out our latest site: Not Always Friendly!

    Not Always Friendly is the latest addition to our family of funny sites and features stories about friends, acquaintances, and strangers who are not always friendly – including friends behaving in funny/interesting ways, frenemies (friendly rivals or “friends” who aren’t really friends), bad-mannered strangers and more!

    Visit Not Always Friendly today and share your story!

    Setting A Promotion In Motion

    | Plano, TX, USA | Coworkers, Technology

    (I work in a call center for a CASE (Computer Aided Software Engineering) tool, helping clients get basic support in how to set up their tool and answer any technical questions.)

    Caller: “Hey, this is [Name] from [Company]. I need some help with the portion of your CASE tool about how to set up your database?”

    Me: “Sure. What sort of questions do you have?”

    ([Caller]’s questions aren’t about the tool itself, but are basic database questions which are well outside of our authority to answer, because it isn’t our tool. We are also not supposed to support customers outside of our CASE tool. In short, he is asking us to be their database administrator.)

    Me: “I’m sorry; I can’t answer the questions you have about this. You should have your database administrator call us and we can help them work through these items.”

    Caller: “Okay. We don’t have anyone here that does that. I’ll get with my bosses about it.”

    (Two hours later…)

    Caller: “Hey, this is [Name] from [Company]. Guess who was just promoted to be a database administrator?”

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