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  • Putting The Brakes On This Scam
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  • Steal Herself For An Arrest

    | TX, USA | Coworkers, Criminal/Illegal, Liars/Scammers

    (I’ve just been hired on at a store as seasonal worker. There have been a few random thefts that can’t be explained.)

    Coworker #1: “They just started up around the time that you and [Other Seasonal Worker] started. It’s funny.”

    Me: “The manager told me about it. She said someone had taken the money we’d collected for the breast cancer awareness and shoved the envelope behind the desk in the office. We’ve also been losing around $10 or $20 from the registers from time to time.”

    Coworker #1: “I can’t believe someone would do that. It offends me so much. God provides for us. I bet they’re using it to buy their drugs. That’s disgusting. If someone wanted to be lazy and just steal, they should let the prison take care of them.”

    Me: “That’s a little harsh, don’t you think? Besides, we don’t know who it is. What if they needed the money for food?”

    Coworker #1: “Because no one steals money for food. I wonder who it is. I know it’s not me or [Assistant Manager]. It could be you or [Other Seasonal Worker].”

    Me: *offended* “I know you don’t know me, but I’d rather have the job than just chance losing it by taking money like that.”

    Coworker #1: “Oh, I didn’t mean it like that. I’m just saying; it could be any one of us. Except for [Assistant Manager]. She works so hard all the time, trying to pay her way through school. I bet it’s [Other Seasonal Worker]. She just looks the part. Like a druggie, you know? And I heard she’s been flitting from one job to the next. I bet she just doesn’t want to get caught.”

    Me: “I’m sure [Manager] will find out who it is and the matter will be settled.”

    (Six months later, we have a robbery. I’m not in on that day, but I hear from another coworker how Coworker #1 was there and gave a lengthy description of the thief to the cops and how it happened. Two weeks after that, she’s no longer on the roster.)

    Me: “Oh, we lost [Coworker #1]?”

    Coworker #2: “You didn’t hear? She got fired for theft.”

    Me: *shocked* “What?”

    Coworker #2: “She kept urging the manager on duty to go get some food, and while he was gone, she shoved the money down her sock and made some sob story about how she dropped some dimes. While she was picking them up, she said the customer leaned over to grab the money and ran out. Except the till squeaks when you take money out and [Manager] tested that. They went over the tapes and saw her stealing it. So they gave her the option to come in and give the money back and just be fired, or they’d call the cops on her.”

    Me: “She always talks about how much money her husband makes! Why would she need to steal?”

    Coworker #2: “I don’t know, but she told the manager it’s because she’s bi-polar and was off her meds.”

    Me: “Did she steal that breast cancer money?”

    Coworker #2: “Yeah! She kept telling everyone it was that other seasonal employee, because she looked like a druggie.”

    Me: “Oh, man. You realize she gave the police a false report, right?”

    Coworker #2: *smirking* “Yeah, so she’s likely going to go to jail anyway.”

    Served By Sheldon Cooper

    | KS, USA | Employees, Ignoring/Inattentive, Lazy/Unhelpful

    (I still like to write letters to a small circle of friends. I often buy fun stamps at the post office for the envelopes. I’m at the new post office, and I decide to buy some new, limited edition stamps that have just become available.)

    Me: “Hi! I’d like 10 of these two-stamps please.”

    Postal Worker #1: “No.”

    Me: “I… What?”

    (I stop, confused, while the worker just looks back calmly at me. I really don’t know what to say. Luckily, another worker I’ve spoken to before, and who is very nice, comes over.)

    Postal Worker #2: “Hi. Is everything all right?”

    Me: “Er, I’d like to buy ten each of these stamps…”

    Postal Worker #2: “Oh, those stamps are sold in sheets of twenty. We’re not allowed to cut them up for sale.”

    Me: “Oh, okay. I’ll just take a sheet of these then.”

    (I make my purchase with Postal Worker #2, and leave. As I exit, I overhear them talking.)

    Postal Worker #2: “Why didn’t you explain to her that she had to buy the whole sheet?”

    Postal Worker #1: “She asked for ten of each. I said no, because we’re not allowed to cut them up.”

    Postal Worker #2: “So why didn’t you explain that to her?!”

    Postal Worker #1: “She didn’t ask about that. Why should I tell her when she didn’t ask?”

    Postal Worker #2: “Dude, you’re worse than Sheldon Cooper!”

    From Not Always Romantic:
    Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 11
    Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 10
    Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 9
    Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 8
    Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 7
    Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 6
    Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 5
    Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 4
    Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 3
    Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 2
    Dating Sheldon Cooper

    Got To Give Him Credit For Trying

    | Montreal, QC, Canada | At The Checkout, Bizarre/Silly, Coworkers, Employees

    (My coworker is serving a young and, I must say, beautiful female customer. He is not indifferent to her beauty. They chat a little while he is preparing her order.)

    Coworker: “That will be $12.45.”

    Customer: “Debby.”

    Coworker: “Oh! Hi, Debby! I’m [Name]. Nice to meet you!”

    Customer: “Hmm…” *slowly waving the card she is holding* “I was actually trying to pay with debit.”

    Coworker: *turning red* “Oh… Yes… Sure….Right away…”

    Not A Televisionary Manager

    | AB, Canada | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (I work in the newsroom of a radio station. When budget time comes around, my station manager asks if there’s any new equipment we need. Just for the heck of it, I put in a request for a TV for the newsroom, so we can monitor the news channels. The next day, the station manager sends me an e-mail with the subject line, ‘here’s what the higher-ups think of your TV idea” and what follows is a long list of jokes my station manager and her boss have made, ridiculing my suggestion. I’m highly offended, and decide to confront the station manager about it.)

    Me: “I can’t believe you and [Her Boss] took my idea and made fun of it like that. I find this behaviour very unprofessional.”

    Station Manager: “I’m unprofessional? I’M UNPROFESSIONAL? YOU’RE the one who’s unprofessional because you didn’t do a news story about MY BIRTHDAY! Every reporter who’s worked here in the past has done a news story about MY BIRTHDAY and made a fuss about me on the air, and you’re the first one who didn’t! Do you know how humiliating it was for me when everyone in the company started asking what the news department did for my birthday, and I had to tell them that you did nothing? SO DON’T TALK TO ME ABOUT UNPROFESSIONALISM!”

    (Since the TV wasn’t that important, I drop the issue completely. A few weeks later, my boss is making his monthly visit. We’re in a meeting, when my station manager barges in.)

    Station Manager: “After doing further research, I have determined that NO OTHER RADIO STATION IN THE COUNTRY has a TV in their newsroom. So drop this TV foolishness once and for all!”

    Me: “First, I have toured [Well-Known News Station], and they have a TV in their newsroom. I’ve also visited friends who work at [Other Radio Station], and they have a TV in their newsroom. And I did my internship at [Sister Station], and, not only do they have a TV in the newsroom, but a TV in the announcer’s booth, too.”

    Boss: “Yeah, a TV in the newsroom is quite a common thing. I’ve been asking [Station Manager's Boss] for one at our flagship station for years, but he keeps saying it’s not in the budget.”

    (My station manager stands there for a bit, just beside herself, not knowing what to say.)

    Station Manager: “Good meeting, everybody! Your feedback will be taken into consideration.”

    (She sprints out of the room. My boss just turns to me and apologizes for me having to work with her.)

    Shouldn’t Make Office Decisions Official

    | England, UK | Bosses & Owners, Coworkers, New Hires

    (I work in a small office whilst my manager works in a smaller adjoining office. He is a good guy but doesn’t think his decisions through.)

    Boss: “Can I have everyone’s attention please?!”

    (We gather around.)

    Boss: “[New Employee] will be joining the team soon, working closely with [Coworker #1] and [Coworker #2].”

    Coworker #1: “Great! So shall we clear the desk between us? It would make a lot of sense that she sit here.”

    Boss: “Well, I was thinking of putting her in my office.”

    Coworker #1: “You want her to work next to you despite her having nothing to do with your job?”

    Boss: “Well, yes.”

    Coworker #2: “And that she will be spending most of her time with us learning what we do.”

    Boss: “Yes.”

    Me: “So to get this clear, the young and attractive lady coming to work here won’t be sitting with the people that she will be learning from, but will be shut in a room with you?”

    Boss: “Yes.”

    Me: “And that makes sense to you?”

    Boss: “Er…”

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