(It’s the end of my shift and my co-worker, Co-worker #1, is going to be by herself for the next two hours. This co-worker is a day shift worker, and is infamous for leaving the store in a terrible state for the night staff.)

Co-worker #1: “Oh man, it’s going to get so lonely now and boring. What am I going to do for two hours?”

Me: “You can do plenty of things. Clean and fill the drink fridge, clean the oven and proofer, wash the dishes, do some prep, fill the sauce bottles and sweep the floor.”

Co-worker #1: “Yeah, but I hate doing that.”

Me: “Well, I guess, but it is your job, so you should probably do it. Anyway, I’m off. Catch ya’ later.”

(Two hours later, I get a text message from my other co-worker, Co-worker #2, who has just come in to work the shift after Co-worker #1.)

Co-worker #2:” Dude! [Co-worker #1] left the store in a s*** state. There were heaps of dishes, nothing was filled up, the floor was dirty and there’s no prep done at all.”

Me: “Seriously? How many customers did she serve?”

Co-worker #2: “Between 2pm – 3pm, five customers, and between 3pm – 4pm, three customers.”

(That’s an extremely quiet day for us. I decide to text Co-worker #1.)

Me: “Hey, [Co-worker #1], [Co-worker 2] has just told me you left the store a pig sty for her. Is this true?”

Co-worker #1: “Oh, yeah, so sorry. I was by myself, but it got really busy and I just didn’t know what to do.”

Me: “You served eight customers in two hours. Wow, you really got hammered. And you clearly had no idea what to do after I just told you as I was leaving. And even if you didn’t remember, you didn’t even bother to ask me or anyone else. You probably should know anyway, considering you’ve already been working here for two years.  At least if you’re going to make up an excuse, make it believable and original.”

(I received no reply from her, and the following Tuesday, she quit.)

Related:
It’s Hard Work When You’re Hardly Working

Me: “Hi, what can I get for you?”

Customer: “Hey, can I get a six inch tuna on wheat?”

Me: “Alright!”

(I proceed to scoop the tuna directly onto the table. The manager, who is standing next to me, points out my silly mistake.)

Manager: “Uh… [name]… you need bread first.”

Me: “…It’s gonna be one of those days, isn’t it?”

(I’m a semi-regular at a sandwich shop near my home. One day, after a wearying day of work, I pop in a little early for dinner. The only employees there are a pair of college-age girls.)

Me: “I’d like a foot-long turkey and ham on wheat, please.”

Employee #1: “Mm-hm. BLT on Italian bread?”

Me: “Um, no. Turkey and ham on wheat.”

Employee #1: “Oh, ok. Would you like that toasted?”

Me: “Sure.”

(Employee #1 finishes putting the correct meat and cheese on the sandwich. She looks confused for a second.)

Employee #1: “You wanted that toasted, right?”

Me: “…Yes. Just said that.”

(Employee #1 looks embarrassed, so I try to give her a reassuring smile as she goes to toast the sandwich. While I’m waiting, Employee #2 goes ahead and takes my payment for the sandwich with no fuss. Employee #1 returns with the sandwich.)

Employee #1: “Toppings?”

Me: “Lettuce, tomato, jalapeño, and bell pepper, please.”

Employee #1: “…Banana pepper?”

Me: “Bell.”

Employee #1: “Okay, sorry about all that. Here is your sandwich.”

Me: “Thanks. And I’ve already paid.”

Employee #2: “No, you haven’t.”

Me: “What? But you just took it…”

(Employee #2 starts giggling.)

Employee #2: “Haha! That was worth it for the look on your face!”

(Both Employees #1 and #2 have a few laughs.)

Me: “Why would you even do that? After the day I’ve been having!”

Employees #1 & #2: “Uh.”

(I start for the door, but turn around and grin.)

Me: “That was worth it for the look on your faces.”

(I have been going to this sub shop for several years. I manage the ice cream store right beside it. I have a discount card that says if you buy one medium drink and one 6″ sub, you get a free 6″ sub.)

Me: “I’m gonna use this card again, so I want a medium drink and two 6″ subs, please.”

Employee #1: “Okay, sure. What kind of sub?”

Me: “Roast beef and provolone please with extra cheese.”

(Employee #1 takes my card and looks at it briefly before ringing the order up. It takes him a minute as the discount is new, and he has only been working there a few months.)

Employee #1: “Extra cheese… Okay, that’ll be $1.93.”

Me: “Uh, dude, I think you rang that up wrong. It was ‘Buy a drink AND a 6″, get a 6″ free.’”

(By now, Employee #2 has come over to see what going on. Employee #1 takes my card and reads it closely. Employee #2 examines the order on the register.)

Employee #2: “$1.93? That seems fair to me.” *swipes my card*

Me: *laughing* “Okay, if you are sure.”

Employee #1: “Yeah, you are always doing favors and stuff for us anyway. I was trying to figure out why you wanted to spend MORE money!”

(I just laughed and he made my sandwich. I went back to work and made all the guys their favorite item from my ice cream store and took it over to them. I think I have made some friends there!)

Related:
Coworkers Uber Alles (Not Always Right)

(Note: I have celiac disease, which is a severe intolerance to wheat gluten, but I’m rather timid about it. However, my university’s food court has recently undergone massive training for food handling with regard to cross-contamination, so I decide to take advantage.)

Me: “Hi, can I get a tuna sandwich on gluten-free bread?”

Employee: *annoyed* “Are you really allergic?”

Me: “Yes, I’m extremely sensitive. Thank you for checking.”

Employee: *sighs* “Okay… well, it’s going to take a while.”

(The employee makes a big show out of gathering the ingredients for my sandwich, which are in special containers so as to prevent contamination with normal bread. She is sighing and rolling her eyes all the while. When another customer walks up, she yells to her coworker.)

Coworker: “What’s the big deal?”

Employee: *loudly* “I’ve gotta make this lady a gluten-free sandwich, and it’s going to take forever!”

Coworker: “Ugh, that’s so annoying!”

Employee: “And it’s such a waste of food.”

Another Customer: “What’s the problem?”

Coworker: “She has to make a gluten-free sandwich, which is really annoying and takes forever because we have to go in the back and get special ingredients and make sure nothing touches anything. Then, the ingredients go bad because nobody eats them. I don’t understand why people have to be such picky eaters, you know?”

Employee: *to me, sarcastically* “Here’s your sandwich. Have a great day.”

Me: “Thanks. And I’m so terribly sorry for making you have to do your job correctly!”

(I later called the manager to complain, who was very apologetic. He called me back to let me know he fired both employees after the incident. It turns out it wasn’t the first complaint that they’d gotten regarding the very same issue. The worst part about the story? I still got incredibly sick from the sandwich.)