Category: Extra Stupid

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I Can Write You A Cheque But It Will All Come To Naught

, | Canterbury, England, UK | Extra Stupid, Money

(I receive a bill from the electric company for £0.00. Thinking that as there is nothing to pay, and I don’t have to do anything, I ignore it. A week or so later, a letter from a debt collection agency arrives, saying that the bailiffs will come to take items worth the sum of the unpaid debt unless it is paid. I call the electric company and explain.)

Me: “…so as there’s nothing to pay, I don’t owe you anything.”

Company Rep: “I’m sorry, sir, but unless we receive payment we will have send the debt collectors. Unpaid bills are a serious…”

Me: “But the bill is for NAUGHT pounds and NAUGHT pence. There is no money. The debt collectors can come if they want, I don’t know what they can take to the value of NAUGHT pounds and NAUGHT pence.”

Company Rep: “We will still need a payment, though…”

(Realising I’m not getting anywhere, I send them a cheque for £0.00. It seemed to satisfy the electric company, and no bailiffs ever appeared!)

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Not Much Meat In The Brain

, | Wales, UK | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(My colleague and I have stopped at [Popular Fast Food Chain] for a meal on our way home. We are both vegetarian.)

Colleague: “I’d like a veggie burger meal, please.”

Staff Member: “I’m sorry we’ve run out of veggie burgers.”

Colleague: “Okay, what else do you have that’s vegetarian?”

Staff Member: “We’ve got chicken burgers.”

Colleague: “…”

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Not Properly Monitoring The Situation

| CT, USA | Bosses & Owners, Extra Stupid, Money, Technology

(My dad works at a hospital in a nearby city, where he helps run the servers. They’re buying a smaller hospital to add to the chain, and he is in a meeting with his coworkers.)

Supervisor: “We just don’t know how we’re going to be able to pay for all the hardware in this new hospital.”

Dad: “Sir, you throw away three or four perfectly good monitors every week because nobody needs them. We can just use those.”

Supervisor: “That doesn’t fix the problems with everything else. How are we going to get the new computers, or the servers?”

Dad: “Stop buying monitors we don’t need.”

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A Hole In Their Understanding

| Coworkers, Extra Stupid, Ignoring & Inattentive

(Our building uses ID cards that you must scan in order to enter the building. These cards have photos on them and a chip inside, and are very expensive. When someone’s card stops working we have to check their permissions first before issuing a new card. This employee calls because her card has stopped working. We’ve checked her permissions, and they are all up-to-date, so we ask her to come up and we will re-issue the card. We are required to take the old card back.)

Employee: *hands me the card* “Yeah, it just stopped working. I can’t get it to let me in anymore.”

Me: *looking at the card, a bit baffled* “Uh, that’s because you punched a hole in it. It’s not going to work because you’ve destroyed the chip that makes it work.”

Employee: “But I want to hang it from my lanyard.”

Me: “Well, put it in this case and you can hang it from there.” *hands over the new card*

Employee: “Okay, fine.”

(A few hours later, the card has been activated, but she calls us up saying it’s not working. We ask her to come back up.)

Coworker: “I’ll need to see the new card we just gave you.”

Employee: *hands her the new card*

Coworker: “…You put another hole in the card.”

Employee: “Yeah, I wanted to put it on my lanyard.”

Coworker: “We already told you it won’t work if you put a hole in it.”

Employee: “But I want to put it on my lanyard!”

Coworker: “I will make you another card, but you cannot put a hole in it. You have to use the sleeve you were given earlier.”

Employee: “Ugh, fine.”

(A few hours later she came back up complaining her second new card wasn’t working. She had put another hole in it. We told her that she wasn’t getting another new card, and that she’d have to come in the front door through security from now on.)

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Not Very Tourism-Friendly

| WA, USA | Employees, Extra Stupid, Tourists & Travel

(I’m a reporter with the local community newspaper, and with it being tourist season, I decide to write an article about the benefits and downsides to tourism in the city. Naturally, I call the Chamber of Commerce, with whom the paper has interacted with on multiple occasions for many different stories. The paper is also an affiliated business with the Chamber.)

Me: “Hi. My name is [My Name], a reporter with [Local Community Newspaper]. I’m writing an article about tourism in the city.”

Chamber of Commerce Rep: “Oh, tourism? Have you been here?”