Category: Geeks Rule

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What Are You Tolkien About?

| CO, USA | Awesome Workers, Coworkers, Geeks Rule

(My coworker and I are total nerds, and we have been good naturedly messing with each other via sticky notes for a while. My coworker has several boxes of ‘Star Wars’ marshmallow cereal in his cube, along with lots of other nerdy toys and such. He is also the Dungeon Master for a Dungeons and Dragons game that my husband and I are part of. There has been a lull in sticky note exchanges, until today.)

Me: *via sticky note* “The computer gnomes demand sacrifice. Cereal will do… for now. Do not disappoint us again, human.”

(The rest of the conversation carried on over IM.)

Coworker: “How am I supposed to know that the computer gnomes are displeased?”

Me: “How should I know? You’re IT. That’s your area of expertise, no?”

Coworker: “The magic blue smoke inside the computers still eludes me… and I never learned gnomish… Apple Products and such… PCs are clearly goblin infested, not gnome infested.”

Me: “Must have been carried over when that auditor brought in her Apple laptop.”

Coworker: “Oh crud, cross contamination… Soon we will have gnoblins!”

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Trying To Read It In Blackest Night

| Atlanta, GA, USA | Coworkers, Geeks Rule

(It’s St. Patrick’s Day.)

Coworker: “Hey, [My Name]. Why aren’t you wearing green?”

(I point to my shirt.)

Coworker: “That’s not green, it’s brown.”

Me: “It’s forest green.”

Coworker: “Oh. Sorry. You know I’m colorblind.”

Me: “It’s a Green Lantern shirt!”

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Quoting Gandalf

| USA | Employees, Geeks Rule

(I’m buying some items while wearing a Hogwarts shirt.)

Employee: *pointing at my shirt* “Ooh! May the force be with you!”

Me: “Yup…”

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Orders Pizza Every Week, Same Bat Time, Same Bat Channel

| Fargo, ND, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Geeks Rule

(I order a pizza. The gentleman who delivers it shows up at my door in a suit and tie, strangely enough. It gets weirder. While I write his tip on the receipt, he asks:)

Delivery Guy: “While I’m here, mind if I tell a joke?”

Me: “As long as it’s a good one!”

Delivery Guy: “Okay, here goes. Who’s a better detective, Batman or Sherlock Holmes?”

Me: “I don’t know.”

Delivery Guy: “Batman, because Sherlock Holmes is fictional.”

(I sputtered my perplexity briefly before thanking him and going back into my apartment. Did Bruce Wayne deliver me a pizza or is there something I’m missing?)

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Throw Your Request Into Oblivion

| Montréal, Canada | Bad Behavior, Employees, Geeks Rule, Money

(It is a few days after the video game collector’s edition of “Elder Scrolls: Oblivion” has released, which came with a metallic replica of the in-game currency the player uses. For fun and added authenticity, I want to get it gold-plated.)

Me: “Hey there, do you happen to offer goldsmithing services?”

Clerk: “Yes! What would you like to get done? We can do gold plating of various fineness for a wide variety of items!”

Me: “Awesome! What would it cost to do a 24-carat plating on this?” *shows her the coin*

Clerk: *frowns in disapproval* “I’m sorry, but we can’t do that. Defacing currency is actually a crime.”

Me: *stunned for a moment* Oh, no worries, this isn’t a real coin. It’s a replica of an Imperial septim from a video game!”

Clerk: *look at me angrily* “That’s even worse! We are NOT going to help you make fake currency! That’s criminal! Get out of here right now before I call the police!”

Me: *shocked in surprise* “But you don’t get it. It’s a fictional coin. It’s from a country that doesn’t exist! It’s from a videogame!”

Clerk: *not listening* “GET. OUT!”

(I left the place dejected and went to another jewelry store where service was much better. The clerk there asked why I looked so worried when asking him for plating and laughed a good deal when I told him the other clerk’s reaction. They gave my coin a flawless job and it looks gorgeous.)

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