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Scratch That Whole Year Off

| ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Employees, Extra Stupid

(I am trying to buy a scratch ticket and because I look my age I’m often asked for my ID. Because I got my driver’s license before I turned 19, it says on the license of the year I turned 19.)

Cashier: “So you’re not 19 until April…”

Me: *confused* “No, I’m 20 in…”

Cashier: *confused look*

Me: “I was born in 1996.”

Cashier: “S***, forgot it’s 2016.”

(So not only did she get my birth month wrong, but also the year, and the fact I needed to be only 18 to buy a scratch ticket. Impressive.)

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Having An ‘Off’ Day

, | Wisconsin Dells, WI, USA | Coworkers

(I start out at my job working night shift for about two weeks and love it. Then I get switched to day shift out of the blue, but it’s understandable because there is only one other day shift clerk. Last week, the manager randomly has me on schedule for a closing shift. There are light switches under the counter for the inside of the store and the outside, like the lights for the gas pumps so people can see. There is one switch that you are never supposed to turn off, but the note is between it and the one above it and since it has been so long since I worked night shift, I forget which one it is and I shut off the bottom one. My coworker (who has trained me) happens to be looking outside at our big light up sign and digital marquee and notices something I don’t.)

Coworker: “Um, did you turn off that switch we’re never supposed to turn off?”

Me: “I don’t know. I don’t think so, but I couldn’t remember which one the note is for because it’s directly in between. Why?”

Coworker: “Oh, no reason. Just turn it back on.”

Me: “What’s it for?”

Coworker: “Well, I’m not entirely sure because I haven’t turned that one off yet…” *turns it back on* “…but I think it’s the sign.”

Me: “What?!” *stands up in time to see sign turn back on* “Umm…”

Coworker: “I think it should be fine as long as no one noticed.”

(Thankfully, after a few seconds of gibberish, the sign went back to advertising just as it had before. But what coworker said was still on my mind, as she is known for making mistakes and has broken things no one thought was possible to break.)

Me: “I love how you said ‘I haven’t shut that one off YET,’ like ‘oh, I haven’t f***ed up in that way quite yet.’”

Coworker: *laughing* “Yeah, because I’ve been too busy finding other ways to f*** up and breaking other things.”

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Put That In Your Pipe And Drink It

| Portland, OR, USA | Employees, Ignoring & Inattentive

(The difference in age for buying cigarettes and alcohol is three years, and I am 19 at this time, I had a lot of issues because of it, but this one was the funniest.)

Me: “May I get [pack of Cigarettes]?”

Worker: “Do you have ID?”

Me: “Yes, I do.” *hands her ID*

Worker: “This says you’re under 21.”

Me: “I am.”

Worker: “Then, why would I sell to you?”

Me: “Those are cigarettes, not alcohol.”

Worker: “Oh, oops.”

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Playing The Irony Card

| WA, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Food & Drink, Job Seekers

(I am standing in line while the person in front of my is asking about the job offering. I didn’t catch the whole conversation.)

Cashier: “Yeah, probably the most important part of the job is making sure you card.”

Customer: “Oh, of course. I don’t want to get anyone in trouble.”

Cashier: “Wait, we are only hiring people over 21. Are you old enough?”

Customer: “Well, you did just sell me beer, so I hope so.”

(Cue a laugh from everyone in earshot.)

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Tea-tering On Falling Asleep

| Fort Wayne, IN, USA | Coworkers, Crazy Requests, Time

(It is one am after my day off. I am finally admitting I’m tired and have relocated to my bed to read just a little bit more before I pass out. Suddenly my phone rings, and it’s my work. I answer expecting it to be some sort of emergency. I am the associate manager.)

Coworker: “I have a customer who just bought a can of [Tea], but it wasn’t until they opened it and took a drink out of it that they realized it was the wrong flavor. Can we trade it out?”

Me: *not quite believing I am called at one am for THIS* “No.”

Coworker: “Well, I thought I’d ask before saying no.”

Me: “If it was unopened, or something wrong with the product, yes, but not just if the customer wasn’t paying attention and messed up.”

Coworker: “Oh.”

Me: “Also, this is NOT something to make a one am phone call about. I was going to sleep.”

Coworker: “Oh. Well—”

Me: “Goodnight.”

(This wasn’t the first time he had called during third shift about such things, but not on things that would make his cash over or short be more than the allowed amount. I think he panicked when a customer complained about things and he didn’t give them their way, so he called me to relay the message to the customer instead of standing his ground. Grow a backbone! And if you wouldn’t call the manager about it at one am, don’t call me either!)