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    Category: Criminal/Illegal

    Owned By The Owner, Part 7

    | Saint John, NB, Canada | Bosses & Owners, Criminal/Illegal

    (One night I get a call from a casual acquaintance:)

    Acquaintance: “Do you know anyone who is free to go take the cover charge at a local pub.”

    Me: “I’m free. What the heck, money is money!”

    (I show up and am given the till, and start greeting people at the door. Some people don’t understand why they have to pay as this pub only has a cover occasionally when they have a band, the rest of the time it is free to come in. So I have to do a lot of explaining. A customer tries to pass me without paying and I stop him.)

    Me: “$2 please.”

    (He shakes my hand.)

    Customer: “Hi, I’m [Name].” *tries again to just walk past*

    Me: “Hi, I’m [My Name] and I still need two bucks.”

    (He cracks up laughing.)

    Customer: “Good answer! But I’m [Name and Last Name]. I’m the owner.”

    (I was quite embarrassed.)

    Related:
    Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 6
    Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 5
    Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 4

    The Cold Hard Truth About Cold Hard Cash

    | Bakersfield, CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Bosses & Owners, Criminal/Illegal, Money

    (I am sweeping up in the lobby when I come across a $50 bill on the floor. It is very near a customer, but he is honest and says it isn’t his. I decide to take it to the lost and found in case someone claims it.)

    Me: *to my manager* “I found this on the floor. I’m sure someone will be looking for it soon.”

    Manager: “Awesome! Thanks.” *he pockets the cash*

    Me: “What? That’s for the lost and found! What if someone comes to claim it?”

    Manager: “You should’ve kept it yourself! Unless they keep track of their money’s serial numbers, they can’t prove that it’s theirs. Take it as a lesson learned!”

    The Theft Finally Registered

    | Australia | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Employees, Money

    (The manager has mentioned to me that there have been several shortfalls in the registers the last few weeks. She has her suspicions as to who it is, as it only happens when one girl is working. I work my first few supervising shifts and notice that she plays with the money in the till. I notice her putting her hand into her pocket as she closes the till. I couldn’t see what it was or could prove anything. That evening we are $20 short. I put in $20 of my own money to make the count correct. The next day I tell my supervisor what I did.)

    Supervisor: “You didn’t have to do that. I told [Manager] and she said that she will get your money back to you.”

    Me: “I just didn’t want to be out that much in my first week of supervising here.”

    Supervisor: “We know who it is. We just don’t know how to broach it without real proof. Just wish she’d stop it.”

    Me: “I have an idea. Leave it up to me.”

    (The next time I work with this girl:)

    Me: “I need everyone to double check the change they give back to customers, please. The other day we were out by $20 and I had to replace it out of my own pocket.”

    Coworker: *looking shocked* “Really, you had to pay it back?”

    Me: “Seeing as I was supervisor and it’s my responsibility, yes. I am not losing my job over $20.”

    (A couple of weeks later the manager got around to giving me that $20.)

    Manager: “I don’t know what you did but there’s been no more shortfalls. What did you say to her?”

    Me: “The truth: that the money came out of my own pocket. She was shocked. She probably thought nothing of stealing from the company but not when it was me. She seems to really like me.”

    (Eventually the girl was asked to leave due to laziness but is lucky because the company would have thought nothing of prosecuting her over the petty thefts!)

    Weeding Himself Out

    | Atlanta, GA, USA | Bosses & Owners, Criminal/Illegal

    (We’re having an employee screening for a movie when a coworker steps out for a few minutes then comes back with a very distinct odor. A minute later, the manager walks up behind him.)

    Manager: *dope-slaps the coworker* “Don’t smoke weed in the hallway!”

    (The rest of us couldn’t stop laughing after that.)

    Belongs In The Car Fool Lane

    | USA | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Ignoring/Inattentive

    (My work is only a 10-minute walk from home. On the walk to work I pass a gas station with a small convenience section. I call in one day on the way into work to pick up some milk and a breakfast snack. I go to the counter to pay.)

    Me: “Just this, please.”

    Cashier #1: “What pump?”

    Me: “I haven’t pumped gas; I just want to buy the milk and snack.”

    Cashier #1: “Lady, I’m not an idiot, and I WILL call the Police if you leave without paying for what you pumped!”

    Me: “I WALKED HERE! Look outside, there are NO cars parked in the forecourt!”

    Cashier #1: “Well, you probably pumped and drove off round the corner when I was on the phone!”

    Me: “Are you crazy?! Check the CCTV, or check your system; it will show I have not pulled up in a car, or pumped anything.”

    (By this time, the shouting has drawn the attention of another cashier, thankfully who I had seen plenty of times before and who I knew well enough to exchange pleasantries with.)

    Cashier #2: “[Cashier #1], what are you doing?”

    Cashier #1: “This THIEF is trying to scam us out of paying her fuel!”

    Cashier #2: “No, she works in the building next door. She comes in all the time; if you paid attention you’d know that.”

    (She then rang me up for my items and I walked out the door, through the forecourt and round the corner to my office. As I rounded the corner, I looked back to see Cashier #1 still watching me as I walked to make sure I don’t have a secret car hidden round ‘the corner.’ At least it woke me up for the day!)


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